Page 90 of Reckless With You

“Don’t cry, baby. It’s going to be okay. We’re going to fight this.”

“He’s got you in his corner. And all of us Carrs. Dear God, that kid’s going to have so much family now,” I said, my voice shaky.

Tucker smiled, and it reached his eyes. “Yeah. So much family. I really shouldn’t have pushed you guys away. All the Carrs are my family. The people in my life who have always been there. I should have let you guys be a part of this.”

I nodded, trying to think of words to say because it was the truth. Even though it hurt at the same time. “Yeah. We’re always here for you.”

He cupped my face, and I really didn’t want him to tell me it was over again. I didn’t want him to tell me that we would always be friends and that, no matter what, we would be in each other’s lives. Because I didn’t know if I wanted only that. I had lied to myself thinking that everything would be okay once we walked away.

It couldn’t be.

But I couldn’t say those words.

“They’re my family. But you? You’re something different. I don’t know how it happened, but somehow, you weren’t just my best friend’s little sister anymore. You were something more. You’re fun and you’re feisty and you’re amazing. You’re brilliant and beautiful, and I love you being in my life. I love spending time with you. I love cooking with you and watching stupid movies with you. I love trying to figure out what we’re going to do for the day during the off hours we actually have. I want to be able to talk to you about Evan and about your brothers and everything else. I want to figure out who we are and where we go from here. I don’t want to walk away again. I don’t want to be fucking Tobey.”

I was fully crying then, hope blooming inside me so fiercely that it scared me. “I want all of that, too. But that’s not what we promised. I don’t want to mess this up.”

“Then we don’t. We never lie again. We always tell each other what we’re feeling and what we’re doing. We make sure the others around us know who we are and what we are to each other. Even as we figure that out. Because what I’m facing, baby? I don’t want to do it without you. I don’t know what it means, and we don’t need to put labels on it now. But I don’t want to do it alone. Because, somehow, I fell in love with you, even though I told myself I shouldn’t. Even though I knew it was the reckless choice. But I love you so fucking much.”

I was full-on crying then, unable to hold back my tears. He smiled at me and then leaned down to pick up the gift.

“I figured I should give you your present now, too.”

I blinked, wiping away my tears as I looked at the box.

“I don’t have yours. I couldn’t bring it out of the closet.” My throat hurt, and I sniffed, knowing I was a mess.

I was always a mess. But, apparently, he had fallen in love with me regardless.

“It’s fucking cold out here, so I’ll show it to you later, but it’s a light catcher. One that you can put in your bedroom and watch the rainbows twinkle off your walls when you wake up in the morning. You’ll bring a little bit of the outside in.”

I held the box close and smiled at him, emotions running through me so fast and quick that it was hard to keep up.

“I got you a dream catcher so, apparently, we were on the same page.”

“Really?” he asked, his eyes dark.

“Yeah. So you never have to deal with your nightmares again. I know it’s silly, but I saw it and thought of you.”

“It’s perfect, Amelia. It’s going to be perfect.”

“I’m not perfect, I’m far from it.”

“Same here. And that’s why we’re going to work. It’s why we’re going to make this work.” He paused. “If you want. Because you haven’t really said anything.”

“I’m not very good at that,” I said honestly. “The last time I told someone I loved them, it wasn’t actually what I felt.”

He nodded, his eyes dimming a little. I was messing this up. I really needed to be better.

“I thought I knew what love was. I thought I knew what I needed to be with someone else. But then when I got to know you better, as I started to feel something for you, I knew that what I felt for that other person paled in comparison to what I feel for you. You are my person. You are the one who makes me smile and want more. You’re the one who makes me laugh and fans this heat inside of me that’s not just attraction. It’s more. It makes me want to figure out who I am, and I know I won’t be alone if I do that.”

“I’m never going to leave like that again. I’ll never push you away. I will do better. That much I can promise you.”

“I love you, Tucker. I know we shouldn’t have fallen this fast. I know it doesn’t make any sense. But I love you. And I can’t wait to figure out exactly what happens next. And see how we’ll fight whatever comes. I’ll always be by your side. No matter what.”

That was a promise I could make. A promise that I knew I would keep no matter what.

He smiled and leaned over me, and my family started screaming and hooting and hollering from behind me in the house.