Page 64 of Embraced in Ink

Waiting to become who he needed to be.

Waiting for Bristol to come back.

Waiting to see how she felt about him once the colored lenses of their romance and what they had promised each other fell away.

The idea that, somehow, they had been playing make-believe this entire time should have hurt, but he couldn’t let it. Because if he didn’t fight for what he wanted, if he didn’t tell her how he felt, then what was the point? And what was the point of wanting Bristol to tell him what he wouldn’t even tell her? It made him a fucking hypocrite, that’s what.

They made their way back to her house.

“I’m tired. I didn’t realize that playing silly games would do that to me.”

“I don’t think it’s only the games. You’ve been practicing your ass off recently.”

Bristol winced. “I’m sorry. I’m trying to get these last songs down for the album, then the tour is coming up, and it’s all so much at once. I feel like I’m losing my mind.”

Marcus moved closer and opened his arms so she could fit against his chest. She slid into his hold, wrapping her arms around his waist as she rested her head on his upper chest. She tucked into him, and he loved it.

But she’d always been there. Before he started to let his feelings change, they had always touched like this.

That was why it was so hard for him to truly discern if this was what she wanted, or if she just didn’t know what else there was.

She had so much going for her, why would she want to stay home with someone who didn’t like to leave the nest? He had his dreams, and he was working on them. But they didn’t go to the same places that hers did. And that was only one part of the problem.

And it worried him. It truly fucking did. But he didn’t know what he was supposed to do about it. Other than be here for her.

And hope to hell she was there for him.

“I’m just tired. I know it’s going to get worse on the long tour, and I’m trying to juggle so much.” She leaned back, looking at his face. “But I’m glad that I have you. You know? That you’re always here. No matter what. And I’m not alone.”

He nodded, tucking her hair behind her ears. “Yeah. I’m glad I’m always here, too.”

He hoped there wasn’t any bitterness in that. Because there shouldn’t be. He was far from bitter when it came to her. Because while he joked that he was always left behind, he liked where he was. He loved the fact that they had their own lives. And in the end, they always came back together.

He hadn’t let himself think about what they could be for long enough that he had hidden it even from himself for all these long years.

But fuck, he loved her. Fucking loved her.

Yet why couldn’t he say the words?

He was as bad as she was. Unable to say the words because he was too damn scared. What would happen once he lost her?

He didn’t have the answers to that, so he didn’t even broach the subject. Once again, he was that fucking asshole.

“Hey, I just realized I never gave you your birthday present,” he said, trying to change the subject. And in the end, if he gave her her present, even if it didn’t turn out, it was showing her a part of himself.

And as he thought about it, he wondered how the hell he had buried his head in the sand for so long. Because he knew exactly how much he loved her. Had put that into her gift.

And yet, he had told himself it was because they were friends. Because they always had each other’s backs.

How idiotic was he, indeed?

“Oh, yeah. I thought your gift was yourself.” She grinned, and he knew she wasn’t that far off.

Because, in a way, that was the truth.

“Partially. But I’m not that egocentric.”

“Well, you have a right to be sometimes. I’m just saying.”