Page 178 of Under the Waves
“Seeing you upset makes me feel sad,” I admitted truthfully. I hated when she was sad knowing that there was nothing I could do but try and help soothe the pain of reopened wounds.
“I’m not sad,” she whispered, shaking her head gently. “These are tears of overwhelming happiness. No one has ever said such kind things to me before, Jasper. It’s okay though because I can handle it, but sometimes…sometimesI wish I didn’t have to.”
“It’s not okay,” I bit down on my bottom lip in an attempt to calm myself down before I spooked her again. “None of that is okay, Poppy. You shouldn’t have to be their punching bag.Fuck,” I groaned, running my fingers through my hair, “you are theirdaughterand that should be enough!”
“But it’s notenough!” she cried, jabbing her hands against my chest mimicking the pounding of my heart beneath my ribs. “Iam not enough!”
“Yes, youare!” I yelled back as I reached out and gripped her cheeks, pulling her body tightly against mine. “You are,” I rasped, intently glancing between her eyes, almost willing her to hear my words and believe them. “Youareenough, Poppy.”
“For you, I might be…but for everyone else? I—”
“Screw everyone else,” I interrupted. “Be enough foryou,Wellsy. Chase your dreams, no matter how childish they may be. Smile and laugh and be playful again. People will never ever be satisfied with who you are, and you will ruin yourself trying to please them, and…I’m quite fond of you, Wells, so please don’t break yourself for them.” She smiled then, small and frail, but it was a smile, nonetheless—a smile I would die to see again. “It’s not worth it. They aren’t worth it. But you know what is?”
“What?” she whispered, teary-eyed.
“You.”
“Jasper—” she sobbed, shaking her head gently as I continued caressing her cheek with my thumb. “Justthank you.For this, for everything…I really don’t deserve your kindness, even though no matter what I say, you still give it to me anyway.”
“Damn straight I will, Wellsy,” I grinned. “And you do deserve it,minha menina surfista. Every last drop of it.”
“I—” she breathed heavily, “I do mean it, Jasper. I am incredibly grateful for everything you have done for me. Being with you these last few months has given me strength I never knew I had to begin with, and I owe a lot of my happiness to you, so for that, thank you.” She smiled up at me, bringing her lips to my cheek and pressing a gentle kiss to my skin—a mere feather of a touch that had my entire body radiate with the light of a million stars. “And I hope you know that you are worth it, too, Spiderman,” she added softly.
“This strength, this fighting courage inside of you has always been there, Wellsy. It has nothing to do with me,” I replied because it was the truth. I didn’t know how she failed to see just how strong she really was.
“It does,” she breathed, reaching up onto her tiptoes as she swung her arms around my neck. I instantly pulled her closely to me, never wanting to let her go. “Everything does.”
For a moment, we stood there tangled in the warmth of one another. I didn’t need the world when I had her. She was everything I’d ever need and more. Poppy Wells had never beenjustaverage at anything—especially when it came to stealing my heart.
Bundled back up in her cotton towel, I pressed a soft kiss to her forehead before gathering her back in my arms and walking us both back into my room. Poppy laughed as I swept her off her feet, burying her face against my chest, arms wrapped around my neck loosely, knowing she was safe with me.
She gasped as I threw her gently onto my bed, a small smirk playing on my lips as she made me turn around so she could pull my hoodie and a pair of boxers on. I changed into some black and red checkered pants and joined her on the bed. Nestling into my side, bodies a mess of intertwined limbs, I held Poppy closeto me, never once letting her go.
“Sweet dreams, Gwen Stacy,” I whispered, letting the night treasure my words. Except when I looked down, Poppy was already cradled by deep sleep, utterly exhausted and drained from the day. Her brown curls were fanned across her face and trailed down her shoulders. Gently, I pushed aside the few strands covering her eyes and let myself marvel at the beauty that was her.
Just when I thought she had finally drifted off into some much needed sleep, I heard her little voice whisper, “I got that tattoo, Jasper. The one I always wanted. I don’t have to be afraid anymore. She can’t hurt me anymore.”
I held my breath, keeping quiet until her small breaths evened out letting me know she was indeed sleeping again. I didn’t remember her ever talking about getting a tattoo.Hell, I didn’t even know she had one.
Her words puzzled my thoughts all the way into the morning until the sunlight filtered through my blinds, and only then when she rolled over did I see a small, butterfly semicolon tattoo hidden behind her ear.
60
Poppy Wells
Waking up wrapped up tightly in Jasper’s soft, cotton bedsheets was a feeling I feared myself becoming attached to. Every moment of last night came back to me in waves, and I was even more certain now that I would never let myself go back to that house again.
I knew…Iknewthat my father had broken my mother in ways I could never begin to imagine, but even that knowledge did not stop me from wishing that there was some small part of her that was untouched by his darkness—a part of her that stillfoughtto be free, just as I had been doing every day of my life since he left us. But now I knew that there was no coming back for her. She was gone.
My mother was gone.
Tugging the sleeves of Jasper’s hoodie down my arms, I tiptoed out from under the covers and towardsthe sound of laughter echoing from the kitchen. Every muscle in my body screamed at me as I walked. I was pretty sure at least two of my ribs were broken, and I had at least a minor concussion…but I just couldn’t step foot inside another hospital. Not again.Never again. Just the thought of it made bile rise in my throat.
Jasper mentioned briefly that his mother was a nurse and that she’d…help me. As best she could. Every part of me shook with the fear that, from one look, she’d be able to tell exactly what had gone down inside that house last night. The horrors my body had been put through. And there wasn’t any part of me that was ready to open that conversation. I feared it would be something I’d end up taking to my grave.
“Did you stick to the meal plan, Poppy?” Her callous and merciless tone ricocheted off me like it did every time we talked. “I’ll be able to tell if not.”
“Yes, mom. I did. I did, I-I s-swear…”