Page 32 of A Sea of Unspoken Things

His hand was tightening on the wheel again, eyes catching mine for a fraction of a second before they returned to the road.

“After—” He stopped himself, jaw clenching.

I didn’t know what he was about to say, but there were several things that could finish that sentence.After you had left. After what happened to Griffin. After everything changed.Apparently, he didn’t want to go there any more than I did because he didn’t finish.

“I packed up and I used the money I had saved to buy this truck. And I just…started driving.”

“Where’d you go?”

He shrugged. “All over. Drove up the West Coast first and didn’t stop until I got to Seattle, then started east. Stopped in Montana for a while, and that’s where I learned to fly-fish. Spent a month in Colorado, then Texas. Over time I started outfitting the truck into a camper, and after that, I really didn’t have a reason to stop driving.”

A reason. The choice of words haunted me. I couldn’t help but wonder if he was thinking thatIhadn’t given him one.

“Johnny didn’t go with you?”

“No.”

The single word felt incomplete. Like there was a longer explanationhe didn’t want to give me. But when I left Six Rivers, I’d thought I was leaving Johnny with Micah. That after I was gone, he’d take over. It was the only way I’d been able to stomach the thought of going to Byron. If I’d known that Micah wasn’t here, that he’d left Johnny, too, I would have come back. Something told me that both Johnny and Micah knew that.

“By the time I made it to New Mexico, I’d been on the road for more than a year. Then I just couldn’t stop thinking about coming home. I realized it was the only place I didn’t want to leave. Or maybe just the only place I felt like Ihadto leave,” he amended.

I tried to analyze the tone of his voice, looking for any hint of his meaning. Did he feel like he had to leave because of me? Or because of Griffin?

“When I got back, I started picking up odd jobs, trying to avoid having to take work at one of the logging companies. And then one day someone came into the diner asking about a fly-fishing guide and Sadie gave him my number. Just kind of accidentally started doing it and never stopped.”

“I didn’t…” I searched for the words, unsure what to say. “Johnny never told me.”

The fact that Johnny never mentioned Micah was intentional for a number of reasons. I didn’t have to hear it from Johnny to know that. He’d never liked the idea of me and Micah being together and he didn’t want me to have any reason to stay in Six Rivers. He definitely didn’t want me to have a reason to come back.

“You think you’ll ever leave again?” I asked.

Micah shook his head. “No. I’m made of this place.”

It was such a simple way of saying it, but the meaning was anything but. That’s what Johnny had always believed, too. That we were made in the dark. Forged from the shadows of this forest as creatures that were created to survive only here. I’d felt that, too. In fact, I was sure that was what was wrong with me. Why I’d never been able to feel like I belonged anywhere else.

“I haven’t asked you…” I hesitated, fumbling over the question.

“What?”

“If you’re with anyone. If youhaveanyone, I mean.”

He smirked, side-eyeing me.

“I know it’s not any of my business. I’m just curious.” I rubbed at the place between my eyes, embarrassed now.

“I’m not with anyone,” he said.

I didn’t know what kind of reply wouldn’t sound strange, but before I could manage to say anything, Micah was already talking again.

“There aren’t exactly a lot of options in a town this small,” he said, setting the cup back into its holder. “And trust me, no one wants this baggage.”

He gave me a knowing look, like I knew firsthand what he was talking about. But we were already much too close to wading into the unknown waters of a conversation like that.

“I’m not judging you, Micah. It was just a question.” I impressed myself with how true it sounded. I knew I had no right to jealousy, but it was still festering. I’d never liked the idea of Micah with someone else.

“When do you have to be back in the city?” He tried to ask the question nonchalantly, but I could hear an undercurrent of tension.

“Next week. There’s a thing I have to be back for.”