Page 59 of A Sea of Unspoken Things

“To put it frankly, Ben didn’t take it well. He really…struggledafter she left. Back in September he actually tried to hurt himself.”

My eyes widened. “Oh my god.”

“I wouldn’t have mentioned it”—she looked a little embarrassed—“but it’s not exactly a secret around here. Everyone in town’s already had their turn talking about it.” She rolled her eyes. “I’m just telling you now to convey the seriousness of the situation. I’ve been trying to help him move past it, and it’s important that this stuff doesn’t get dredged up again, if you know what I mean.”

Olivia’s mention of Ben being fragile suddenly made sense. She’d probably been referring to the rumors about what Sadie alluded to now.

I let out a breath. “I understand. I’m really sorry. I had no idea.”

“How could you?” She gave me another smile, the accusation still hovering between us. I’d broken Micah’s heart when I left. I’d turned my back on this town. And I didn’t know this place or its people anymore.

She let her gaze linger on me a moment longer before she went back to the stack of plates. The fact that there were uncanny similarities between me and Autumn was unnerving, to say the least. But that’s what this forest did, wasn’t it? Tell the same stories over and over?

For the first time, I was asking myself what exactly about Autumn Fischer had managed to transfix this sleepy logging town. Even Olivia had what felt like a shrine dedicated to the girl in her classroom. What hold did she have over this place? These people?

My gaze traveled over the pictures on the wall, looking for one of Autumn, but I didn’t find one. If Ben hadn’t heard from her since she’d left, then maybe Olivia was the only person who’d been able to get ahold of her. I didn’t love the idea of going back and asking her more questions about Autumn, and I was long past the point where I should talk to Amelia Travis about all of this. That was the next thing I needed to do.

I stepped out onto the sidewalk and started up the street, but when I felt the hair-raising tingle of someone’s attention on me, my pace instinctively slowed. I turned my head, scanning the road until I found a pair of eyes on me. It was Ben.

He sat behind the wheel of the gray truck, and as soon as I spotted him, he looked away, turning the key in the ignition. The engine rattled to life and he fumbled with the gear, pulling out of the parking spot a little too fast. Exhaust billowed from the tailpipe as he made it up the road, but just before he turned out of sight, he looked at me in the rearview mirror. My feet stopped and I held his gaze, trying to read him. There was something harsh and heavy in his expression before he turned out of sight.

As soon as I got back in the 4Runner, I checked my phone again for a missed call or text from Autumn. But there was nothing, and I was finished waiting.

I pulled up her Instagram profile, scrolling through the posts to find the handles that appeared most frequently. @sooziekyoo was a mostly dead account, and @firstfrostchronicle looked like nothing more than a hobby photographer’s page filled with abstract macro lens shots.

I clicked on Autumn’s tagged photos next. There weren’t many, but several posts by other accounts had tagged her going back as far as three years. She wasn’t the main subject of most of the pictures, butthere was one particular post by @marimarimayhem where Autumn’s face took up half the image. I clicked on it.

It was a photo of Autumn and another girl, their faces cheek to cheek. The caption read,Roomies! Five weeks and counting!

I tapped the handle of the account that posted it and the second girl’s face filled the feed. The profile listed the name as Maria Alvarez, and the description beneath it had a few song lyrics and an emoji of a graduation cap followed byFreshman at Byron School of the Arts.According to the captions, the posts before and after the one with Autumn appeared to be from freshman orientation. This girl was Autumn’s roommate.

I sat up straighter, tapping the message button. I knew I’d already taken this too far, but if Autumn wasn’t going to respond to me, I needed to try something else. Anything else.

I typed, holding my breath.

Hi, sorry to reach out like this, but I’m trying to reach Autumn Fischer. Do you know how I can get ahold of her? It’s urgent.

I tossed the phone onto the passenger seat and started the car, but before I even had the gear in reverse, the screen lit up again. I picked up the phone, reading the notification.

@marimarimayhem replied to you

I hit the banner and the app automatically reopened to where Maria’s message was nested beneath mine.

lol if you find out, let me know

She owe you money too?

My brow creased as I typed a reply.

Sorry?

I messaged back and a symbol appeared onscreen to indicate that Maria was typing. I waited. Her response popped up a second later.

autumn ghosted me

When?

before the semester started