Page 155 of Payoff Pitch
It’s the middle of the night, and I can’t sleep. I’m often awake at night contemplating my future with Bailey.
I tiptoe downstairs in a pair of athletic shorts and a T-shirt. I don’t see Kamryn in the kitchen. Maybe the insomniac is finally sleeping. I’ve never met a person who sleeps so little.
I pour myself a whiskey but simply stare at the amber fluid. It’s been a while. I’ve barely touched it since the accident. Only on the occasional night when everyone else is imbibing too.
I’m trying not to depend on it to get me to sleep like I used to. Bailey opened my eyes to the dangerous road I was headed down, but tonight I feel like I deserve one.
I continue to stare at it but can’t seem to take the sip I’m craving, hearing Bailey’s voice in my head. I’ve committedto only being a social drinker.Alone in the middle of the night certainly doesn’t qualify, Montgomery. I squeeze my eyes shut and eventually pour the contents down the drain.
I’m considering braving the cold out back to have a cigar. I should be safe from the water gun brigade during the middle of the night. I need to run upstairs to get warmer clothes. I’m contemplating doing just that when I hear a cry coming from Bailey’s room. I run down the hallway, rush into her room, and find her sweating and shaking. Her clothes are soaked.
“What’s wrong?”
She breathlessly rubs her eyes. “I had a nightmare. And then I woke up and realized that reality is worse than the nightmare.”
Her fists curl before she punches the bed and begins sobbing. My heart breaks for her.
I’m not sure if she wants my help, but I can’t not go to her. I sit down on the bed and pull her up and into my arms. She lets me hold her as she cries into my chest. I’m realizing this is the first time I’ve truly held her since before the accident. It feels so nice. I desperately want to be the one to comfort her.
She mumbles into me, “Can…can you get Kam?”
I swallow down the lump in my throat. “Let me be here for you. I’ll hold you until you fall back asleep.”
She shakes her head. “I’m covered in sweat. I want to take a shower. Please get her. I’m sure she’s walking around somewhere.”
“I didn’t see her. I think she’s finally sleeping. She must need it. I’ll help you.”
She hesitates briefly before nodding.
I carry her into the bathroom, and together we remove her clothes. It’s been so long since I’ve seen her body. I can’t help but run my eyes up and down her perfect form. She’sso beautiful.
After doing my best to get her hair into a bun, I start to position her shower chair when she stops me. “I’m so fudging sick of showering in that damn chair. Can you…can you come in with me? Hold me so I don’t have to sit in it? Make sure I don’t fall again.”
It feels like Christmas morning. “Of course I can. Whatever you need.” I’m so freakin’ happy she asked, I can barely contain myself.
I quickly strip, set out the towels, and we step into the shower together. Holding her naked body close to mine feels so fucking good I want to weep.
Her arms are wrapped around my waist and mine around her whole body. I can feel her relax into me with her head buried in my chest. We simply stand there and silently let the water beat down on us. It’s our most intimate moment in nearly a year. We might have had plenty of sex in that timeframe, but nothing that felt this intimate. I want this with her. I need it. It feels like she needs it too.
Without moving her, I manage to squeeze a little of her body wash onto my hands and rub it over her back, shoulders, and anywhere I can reach without releasing my hold on her. The scent is strong and familiar. It’s uniquely hers.
I hold her with one arm and, with the other, I rub it over her front. She doesn’t flinch when my hands run over her breasts and through her legs.
She eventually lifts her head and looks me in the eyes. Even though her long lashes are covered in water, I can see tears in her eyes. She croaks out, “I miss you. I wish I didn’t. I’ve been trying so hard to be strong. I want to let go of you, but I can’t.”
I brush back a few strands of hair that have fallen to her face and look her in the eyes. “What if I don’t want you to let me go?”
Tears stream down her face. She looks sopained.
I want to kiss her but equally don’t want to do anything to cause her to pull away.
After a brief stare down, she reaches back and turns off the water. “Take me to bed.”
My shoulders fall. “If that’s what you want.” Reaching for the towels, I dry both of us before lifting her like a bride and carrying her to her bed, carefully lying her down.
I’m about to gather my clothes from the bathroom when she grabs my arm. “When I saidtake me to bed, I meant for you to stay.”
I want to jump up and down in glee. I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy in my life. I don’t have any idea exactly what she wants, but anything that involves me being in the same bed as her works for me.