Page 164 of Payoff Pitch
“I’m guessing he and Tanner aren’t close?”
“No, not at all. He was a dick to Harper earlier. It’s certainly clear Fallon doesn’t like him. Poor Tanner.”
“Poor Tanner? What about me? I had sex with the shithead.”
“You’ve had sex with a lot of shitheads. That’s nothing new.”
She lets out a laugh. “True. Good ones are hard to find, both men and women. I swear there are more crazy people than normal ones out there.”
“And which category do you think you fall into?”
She smiles. “You’re feeling salty today. I like it.”
I sigh. “I’m just realizing why Tanner is the way he is. I may have been too hard on him.”
“Maybe I have too.”
My jaw drops. “What?”
She rolls her eyes. “Look at all he’s done for you. I know we clash at times, but he’s obviously gone above and beyond for you, Bails.”
“I know he has.” I motion toward her shopping bags. She’s got three big ones. “I see you were shopping. What did you get?”
“I needed a few things.” She reaches into one, pulls out a box of condoms, and throws it on my bed. “I got you some more condoms. You two have been having so much sex, you must be running low, right?”
She stares at me oddly, waiting for a response. This feels like a test. One I’m about to fail.
I scrunch my face. “I know it’s against your rules, but we haven’t been using condoms.”
She pinches the bridge of her nose. “Bails, didn’t the doctor tell you they had to remove your IUD when they removed your ovary?”
I shrug. “Yes, but Tanner is shooting blanks. It doesn’t matter. He hasn’t been with anyone else since me. I needed to feel all of him. I needed things to be like they were the first time around.” Holding up my hands before she argues with me, I say, “I know you think I’m in over my head, but I truly needed him the past month. He’s my happy place. You know it’s helped me.”
She takes a few deep breaths and rubs the spot on her forehead like she does when she’s stressed. I’m not sure why it’s a big deal.
“Kam, I need to talk to you about something and you’re not going to be happy.”
She visibly swallows but simply nods her head. I think on some level she knows what’s coming.
“I know you mentioned us moving back home.”
“And?”
“Kam, I love him. I’m in love with him. I know I’ll never love a man more than I love this one. If the ups and downs of the past year have taught me anything, it’s that. And I know he loves me right back. You can’t possibly argue with that.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying that maybe I can be flexible. Maybe I don’t need marriage and kids of my own if I have him and Harper. Sometimes life doesn’t go exactly how you plan. You’ve got to go with it. Look at what happened to me. It’s given me some perspective.” I run my fingers through my hair. “I just…I need him. My heart belongs to him. I can’t be without him anymore.”
She has an unreadable look on her face. I thought she’d yell and scream about me giving up on what I’ve always wanted for a man. It’s basically against everything she stands for.
In the wake of her deafening yet odd silence, I continue, “I think you should move back to the apartment. I’m going to talk to Tanner about telling Harper about us and giving this a go. My heart is telling me that this is where I belong. He’s my home.”
She remains silent. Kamryn Hart has never been silent about anything in her entire life.
“Say something. You not screaming at me is unsettling.”
She lets out a nervous laugh before pinching her lips together. “I think I need to sit on it for a minute. Let me know when dinner is ready. I…umm…need to do some research on my computer.”