Page 77 of Watching Henry

He literally walked her around the bus, which... looked like a bus. But once inside, she could see that the seat had been removed and benches put in, there was a small kitchen area and large speakers for a sound system.

“It's not the comfiest ride in the world,” Brent said. “But she's big and she saves on hotel bills.” He paused. “Only, um, the whole bathroom and showering thing needs some work.”

“I've got a gym membership,” Hadley said.

Brent brightened. “Awesome. And I gotta say, I'm stoked to see you. What have you been up to?”

Hadley took a breath, then shrugged. “Nannying.”

He frowned at her. “For real?”

“For real.”

“Kids?”

“Three of them,” she grinned, thinking of Charlie's face if he could see the inside of this bus.

“That sounds... interesting.”

He didn't make it sound interesting. “Actually, it was awesome,” she said. “Best job I've ever had for sure.”

“For real?” he asked again.

He was perched on one of the benches, sun shining on his dreadlocks and there was dust dancing in the air around him. Despite the makeover, the bus still smelled of boxed lunches and new crayons. It wasn't the sort of place she'd imagined that she'd have an epiphany.

“For real,” she said. And she meant it.

It really was for real.

Why on earth hadn't she realized it at the time? Why hadn't she realized that it was the perfect job, that it was the only job that she'd ever had where she woke up in the morning and wanted to work? She looked around the bus.

Suddenly, disappearing on the road didn't sound quite as exciting as it had before. Her hands were shaking as she picked up her backpack. “Uh, actually, Brent, I really appreciate this, but...”

“But you're not gonna make it?” he hazarded.

“Uh, I think I have something to do,” she said. “Um, I think I have a life to plan. Does that sound weird?”

“Very,” Brent said, but he was standing and squishing her into another hug. “There's no point in freedom if we don't make choices,” he whispered into her ear. “You go and do you.”

“Are you sure?” she asked, pulling back, feeling guilty that he'd stopped for her, waited for her.

“Had, you look like you've suddenly found the Holy Grail or something. The way you're shining right now, I don't think anything could stand in your way. Go find it. Go find her. Whatever it is that you need to do. Life doesn't wait for anyone, you gotta go grab it.”

And then she was kissing his rough cheek and clambering down from the bus and watching it drive away leaving her alone on the street.

Her heart hurt, her stomach hurt, every muscle hurt, and her hands were still shaking. But the bus had been wrong. Her old life was wrong. There was no fit there anymore. Because she wasn't looking anymore, she'd found what she needed, she just needed to get her act together and do what needed to be done. Just like her father had said.

She looked down at her bursting backpack. She'd known this for longer than she'd realized. Her pack was full of stuff that made sense for the mountains but not for the desert. She'd packed to find Florence, she'd packed to find her life.

With one hand she hailed a cab, with the other she pulled out her mobile.

“Take me to the train station,” she said, climbing into the back of the cab.

The phone was already ringing.

“Eleanor?” she asked as the phone on the other end picked up.

“Yes,” said a cautious voice.