Page 101 of End It All

Wait a fucking minute. "I’m not a bottom."

Harlow paused with his phone in his hand. I slowed to a stop at a red light, trying my hardest to focus on the road ahead.

"You can't seriously still believe that."

When I didn't say anything, Harlow unbuckled and snapped his fingers in my face. Blood flakes went everywhere. I was going to need the car heavily detailed. I slapped his hand away. Denial felt stupid, and it wasn’t as if I wasn’t bottoming. It just happened that way with Blake.

"What the fuck was that about up there?" I asked, changing the subject back to safe waters.

"Okay, let's switch the conversation. I made a decision, and I knew leaving you under any of my brothers was a bad call. Plus, I missed this. Benito lets me torture and kill but every time we do it together, I get distracted and end up wanting to suck his dick."

"You know you can keep some things to yourself."

"I know."

I took off, heading toward their home, still unsure of everything but oddly feeling as if it was bound to work out. "You don't have to tell me how much you love him, I get it."

Harlow shrugged. "I wasn't doing it to hurt you, but I can't say I'm not a little concerned."

"About what?" I glanced over at him.

"You still harboring feelings for me."

I blew out a breath. "Everyone keeps asking the same fucking question." I turned to look him dead in the eyes. "Harlow, I swear, ain’t nothing left. My dick doesn't so much as twitch when I look at you. All I have for you is mild respect and a hint of fear." The only reason I feared his crazy ass was because he knew secrets about me from my childhood, ones I wanted to stay buried.

"Oh good. I'd hate for Benito to have to fight you again."

Yeah, let's bring that shit up, makes me feel real good about myself.

"Since we're finally talking about this shit. Why couldn't we work out?" I ground my molars. "And don't fucking say the bottom shit."

Harlow laughed. "Someone is touchy all because he got called out."

I am going to kill him.

"We saw each other at our ugliest.” He sighed. “You've seen things happen to me and been there at my lowest."

"Yeah, same for you."

He nodded. "Can't exactly look at you the same after seeing that shit."

I opened my mouth to tell him that wasn't true, but then was I being an idiot? There had been a lot of shit we'd gone through, and time after time, I'd found myself hoping more to protect him and erase it from both of our minds. It was less of wanting him because of attraction and more of wanting to get away from the shit hand we’d been dealt.

"Yeah, see." He stared out the window for a bit and the car was filled with an overwhelming silence. “We could never have an honest relationship. All I can see is us being great, until we weren’t. And neither of us would be willing to hurt the other. Not for real.” My stomach squeezed at his words, he was right. "Plus, like I said, you're a fucking bottom. I ain’t topping you." A literal shudder raced over Harlow's body.

I chuckled at his stupidity. "Noted, wouldn't want you anywhere near it, and I’m not a fucking bottom. Vers at times."

"Whatever you have to say to sleep with a gut full of cum at night."

“I don’t do that!” I argued.

“Suuuuuure,” Harlow droned on. “I know a bottom when I see one.”

I needed to get out of this endless conversation about how I did or did not take dick up the ass. "What was this business about me marrying into the family?"

"Right, I have to call Benito. How quick do you think you can convince Blake to marry you?"

I slammed my foot on the brakes just outside of Benito's building. Car horns blared and a few curses were shot our way. None of it registered as I stared at Harlow in confusion. The man had given me whiplash.