Page 80 of The Damaged Billionaire's Obsession
“Oh, fuck, it’s my fault.” I knew I should have had an emergency pull cord installed in the bathroom when she fell the last time.
“Bonnie. Don’t be puttin’ this on yerself. It was a cruel twist of fate. An accident. It’s not yer fault.”
“Twiggy? Is Nan…”
“Aye, love. I'm so sorry. Found her meself when I dropped in. I called for help, but was already too late... she hit her head somethin' fierce.”
She was gone when Twiggy found her. Oh, God. Nan!
He keeps talking, but I don’t hear his words anymore. I crumple to the floor and bite on my fist to keep from crying out and alarming Twiggy. My face is already wet with tears, and an indescribable pain and guilt hacks away at my chest, hollowing it out with every silent sob.
“Bonnie?”
“Still here,” I finally manage to say in between taking deep, uneven breaths.
“Want me to sort a flight home for ya?” he asks.
Home. It sounds weird. I have a home, only it’s not home. It’s hell.
“No, I don’t want to go to hell… uh, home. Twiggy, I’ll call you back later, okay? I need to go.”
I run to the bathroom and promptly lose the little food I had in my stomach.
Oh, God. Nan is dead. She died. All alone in her bathroom.
I sit on my bathroom floor and cry. She was the only one I had, and now, she’s gone. She died all alone.
I curl myself tighter and tighter into a ball, as if doing so would shrink the pain and suffering overtaking my body. It doesn’t.
I don’t know how long I sit there for. I might have fallen asleep, but when I become aware of my surroundings again, my knees are cramped and my butt hurts. It’s dark outside and raining. It’s grown dark in the bathroom, too. My phone battery has died.
I sit for a long moment, remembering what happened to Nan, and a fresh wave of tears coats my already tear-stained face. My throat is itchy and sore. I stand gingerly, dragging myself to the bedroom and collapse heavily on my bed.
I don’t bother putting on the lights. The darkness reflects the state of my soul right now. I look around the world that Nan doesn’t exist in anymore.I feel so incredibly alone and bereft.
I don’t want to sleep. I don’t want to eat. Right now, I only want…
Oh, God, my heart doesn’t quit.
I want Ethan.Only Ethan.
I just want his arms. I want to put my face against his skin and cry.
The need hits me so fiercely, and I have no strength left to deny myself. I’d scoffed at his motive for sending me his address earlier, but it’s the only lifeline I’ve got right now.
I want him to tell me it'll be okay. Or that it won't. I just want him.
I’m done resisting.
I change into jeans and boots and grab my helmet on the way out. It's dark, cold, and raining and I don’t even know if he’s in the country, but I’m not staying here one more minute.
When I reach Ethan’s Greenwich home, I’m sure I look like what the feral cat dragged in.
The gravelly voice on the intercom by the gate doesn’t confirm if he’s in or not, but I suppose with the floodlights that came on during my approach they’ve seen that the wet, shaking mess waiting outside is unlikely to pose any danger.
The gate swings open, and I start down the long driveway. The moonless sky turns the sprawling mansion into a beacon of hope in the darkness. I stop in the wide circular courtyard, where an abstract sculpture surrounded by a huge lighted fountain stands.
The grounds are impressive, and boxwood shrubs and fir evergreens dot the land as far as I can see. I see other smaller houses in the distance, which are also huge by all standards. The rest is obscured by the darkness and rain.