Page 40 of Lemon Cake

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Page 40 of Lemon Cake

He tilted his head and kissed her hair, soaking in the attention and trust she was gifting him. “Anything for you.”

“I have trouble believing that people aren’t bothered by it. Thatyouwouldn’t be bothered.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because I still look at myself and wish I’d never gotten on my motorcycle that day.”

“What happened?”

Gemma sighed, and for a moment Rider thought she would change the subject again. Then she started to speak. “I sped through a curve. It wasn’t anything I hadn’t done before, but there’d been an oil spill. I slipped. It’s odd because most people say they see their life flash before their eyes. All I could feel was this feeling of failure. I’d been on top of the world: excelling at football, graduating high school with phenomenal grades and planning my first trip to Europe. Everything was perfect—until it wasn’t. The sense of security I had was gone, whipped away and I guess it never came back.”

Rider hugged her tighter, his mind trying to find words to make her feel better, but the only thing he could do was hold her and listen—which turned out to be exactly what she needed.

“It was that feeling of something you can’t control taking everything you have—it never left. I learned to cope with it, but it will always be there. And then there was the hate towards myself. The constant wishing I could go back in time and stop myself from taking that ride. I couldn’t look at myself for months—any part of me.”

“What helped you get through that?”

“At first, nothing. But one day it clicked in my head, and I couldn’t live my life depending on others. So, I forced myself to get up and work with my physical therapist. I needed the prosthesis to survive, and that was my new goal.”

“Has accepting yourself gotten easier?”

“A little, but it depends on the day. In the beginning, I fell a lot, so I was afraid to go out and embarrass myself.”

“If it helps, I would throw myself to the ground next to you, cursing the invisible crack in the asphalt that took us both down.”

Finally, Gemma rested her chin on his chest and smiled up at him. “Well, that’s a perfect headline. ‘Star football player falls on invisible pebble. Injured for the rest of the season.’ Not sure how I’ll explainthatto your coach.”

He pushed a stray bit of loose hair behind her ear and rested his head back, drawing in the feeling of her weight on top of him. “Thank you for trusting me.”

“Thank you for listening.”

“We all have bad days. Just wait until I fall into one of my moods after losing a game.”

“Well I’m here for you, even though you probably won’t want to talk about it.”

“Just smile at me and know that even if I don’t return the smile, you made the sun peek through the storm.”

Gemma stretched and kissed his cheek before reclaiming her spot on his chest and wrapping her arms tightly around him.

Rider knew that Gemma was his special one. He’d known as much after their first date, but that night solidified it. After seeing her on the bed, crying from the fear of his rejection, he knew he would always want to be there—for both the good days and the bad.

After a single episode, Gemma dozed off in his arms. With a smile, he carried her back to bed and tucked her in beneath the blankets. Just as he turned to leave, a soft, sleepy voice called for him.

“Stay.”

Rider smiled, his chest swelling with pride. “I’ll be right back, just let me grab my sweatpants from the truck.”

“You came prepared.”

“Always.”

He grabbed his clothes and changed in her bathroom, noting the interior. There was a stool under the sink that he assumed she used to get ready in the mornings. The shower had a seamless entry, with a sturdy shower chair. Nothing was stored too high, and the bathroom was spacious enough to accommodate her wheelchair.

As he walked back to the bedroom, he studied her home closely. The wide hallways with spacious turns around the corners, and the hardwood floors. There were no rugs or carpeting that would prevent her chair from getting around.

Gently, Rider slid into her bed, wrapping his arms around her from behind and moving in close. She leaned into him, emitting a pleased little sound as he pulled her closer, falling into a deep sleep.

Rider




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