Page 28 of Petite Fleur

I'd let the tree have our bodies.

We could rot together until I followed her into the next life and every life after that.

But I can't do that to her.

I can't take the most beautiful soul I've ever seen and destroy it, so I have to watch from afar.

I have to love this gorgeous creature from a distance.

I have to force myself to move on with my life as much as possible, if it's even possible.

So far, it isn't.

Work is my only distraction from the magnetic pull that this woman has on me.

Although I have to admit, I'd rather be following Maeve to class right now than see my schizophrenic patient.

I had him committed late last year, but now he's finally out, and I finally get to see what they've done with him and how he's doing.

I was supposed to have him out in January, only leaving him there for a few months, but I've been stretching myself so thin to stalk Maeve that I haven't had time.

I've even double-dosed a few of my patients to ensure they're docile enough to neglect.

Fuck, what is wrong with me?

I should be the one in a facility, for fuck sake.

Clearly, I've lost my mind, and the only one to blame is that ethereal brunette who is wasting her time in environmental conversation class right now.

Speaking of, that's her least favorite class.

Every day, when she walks out of her lecture hall, she looks upset or annoyed and avoids her classmates.

She walks into her class in her usual cheerful and quiet mood, smiling at everyone while keeping her head low, but by the end of class, she's a totally different person.

She's a shell of who she walked in as, and I haven't figured out why.

The protective part of me wants to storm into that lecture hall and demand answers. That part of me wants to break whoever upsets ma petite fleur.

I bet they would bleed beautifully.

While I may know the big things; I know her schedule, what she does in her spare time, what makes her happy, and who all her friends are, I don't know what her plans are at the end of the semester.

Is she going home for the summer?

Where is home for her?

On the one hand, I need her to leave for the summer. I need three months where this woman does not consume my every thought. I need the opportunity to forget her.

On the other hand, I want to dare her to attempt to leave me just so I can drag her back.

While I may not be able to have her, I can't just not see her anymore.

I know, I've tried.

Last week, I had to leave town for a few days to handle some business. One of my patient's abusive mothers needed handling. It almost killed me to be away from Maeve for that long.

I had to stop myself from banging on her door the second I was back in town.