Page 16 of Reckless Love
I feel like the biggest fraud there is.
I’ve kept secrets for a long time and it feels like they’re starting to catch up with me.
Sometimes I can’t believe that I’m cheering again. I’ve loved being part of the Colorado Mustang Cheerleaders this season, but at thirty-one, all the restrictions can be hard to take.
In a lot of ways, it’s like putting on a familiar sweater.
My dad is the pastor of Silver Hills Community Church and the list of rules I grew up with as a PK—pastor’s kid—are similar to the rules I have to follow as a cheerleader for a pro team.
No gum in church/no gum in public.
Modest attire/respect the dress code even when off-duty.
Always look your best/Look impeccable at all times.
No tattoos/Conceal any tattoos you may have.
No swearing/No swearing.
I know how to toe the line.
But if everyone knew the latest secret I'm keeping, I’m sure I’d get fired from my job, and my parents would be mortified. My friends would probably get the biggest kick out of it and be so proud of me for doing something like this, because it's so out of character for me.
I feel like the biggest hypocrite.
I’ve always done things my parents wouldn’t approve of and excused not telling them because I’m an adult and I don’t want to disappoint them. But for the past ten months, I’ve been leading a double life, and I'm exhausted from it.
I walk back to the office I was hoping Levi and Rhodes wouldn’t see, where books line the walls, mostly of one title:It Was Always You.
The book thatIwrote.
Once I’ve signed into my computer, I pull up the dashboard to see how much my book has earned today. I can't stop the grin that takes over my face when I see the crazy amount that's in there.
You’re doing it, Elle.
I still can’tbelievethis is happening to me. I squeal as I check the rankings on Amazon and see that my book is still in the top 100.
I’ve worked at a chiropractic office for years, and I still do occasionally. Once I knew I’d made the team, I cut down on my hours at Estevez Chiropractic Care. I’ll probably need to give this job up soon with the way the book has taken off and how busy I am with the team, but I love the people. In the past, I loved how busy it was, and I needed an excuse for how I was able to afford this condo, because no one would believe that I could afford it on a cheerleader's salary. We make so little compared to the time we put into it.
No one has any idea that I've been writing for a long time, and after I decided on a pen name—Zoey Archer…I know, I know…just another reason for me to be ashamed of myself, using Rhodes’ last name—I started to seriously consider putting it out there. I’ve always thought the name Archer sounded so distinguished, and it was my way of giving my bestie a little secret shout-out. I had no idea anything would ever come of any of this, but wow, has it ever.
I finally had the nerve to put my book up for sale online ten months ago, and it…exploded. I did a few anonymous TikToks like I’d seen on Booktok, and while mine didn’t go viral, several booktokers who saw it posted about my book when they read it, andtheirswent viral. Within days, my book sales skyrocketed.Foreign and domestic publishers have messaged me about acquiring rights and I recently sold the audio rights. I should be getting the final files back any day. I can’t wait to tap into a new audience who loves audiobooks.
I’ve also acquired an agent, Rosie, and it’s a whole different experience with her on board as my second book gets ready to drop. I have a PR team and the whole works.
It's been the most amazing thing I’ve ever experienced. Iget emails all the time from readers who love my book, and I’m still pinching myself. I can’t believe they’re reading my words!
The success of my book is what gave me the courage to go ahead and try out for the team. I’d wanted to for so long, but I didn’t want to upset my parents by wearing the skimpy outfits and dancing provocatively in front of millions of people. They don’t love it and haven’t made any secret of that.
But I woulddieif my parents ever found out about my book.
They would be mortified that their daughter is writing romance…and not clean romance either. My sex scenes have been so spicy, the chili peppers reviewers give to specify steam levels keep growing.
I had to get the steam out somewhere…my ex-boyfriend Bernard sure wasn’t enough of an outlet.
Writing about Ryder and Eliza going from friends to lovers helped me school my lusty thoughts into a healthy…and profitable…outlet.
Because that’s the secret that I’m most terrified of exposing…