Page 39 of Knot a Bad Idea
Donovan sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “I didn’t mean for you to hear that. I’m sorry.”
“Are you sorry that I heard it, or sorry because it’s not true?”
I already know the answer; I don’t know why I’m torturing myself.
He shakes his head. “April?—”
“You made me believe it wasn’t about the contract anymore,” I insist, and he flinches. “I felt it with you. Why—why would you say those awful things?” My voice cracks. “Why are you like this, Donovan?What’s wrong with you?”
I realize how ridiculous I sound. He could easily throw those words back in my face if he wanted.
I’m the one that’s in therapy because I can’t even handle a locked door.
He sighs and looks away. “You’re not good for the pack, April,” he says simply.
I blink.
The words hurt. They hurt so badly.
I want to fall onto the pavement and disappear.
But I stay frozen, staring into Donovan’s eyes in disbelief.
Baby steps.
I can take baby steps.
“That’s not true,” I say quietly. “I’ve been good for all three of you. Iamgood. I am agood person.”
It’s starting to rain. The air smells like wet pavement and Donovan, and my legs feel like they might give out if I stay near him any longer.
“I’ll call you a ride,” he says, completely ignoring my statement.
“Fuck your ride,” I snap, my voice shaky. “I’m calling my own.”
I head away from the hotel, ignoring Donovan’s snarl as he calls my name. I freeze, wanting to turn around and obey him.
His commanding tone washes over me, but still, I walk on, my heel catching on the sidewalk.
I almost trip, adding insult to injury.
I don’t know how long I walk, storming off like I’m in some awful romantic comedy.
It’s all so embarrassing.
If what Donovan said about Liam and Hunter is true…
Then they’ll have no trouble finding someone else.
Someone that’s not a nobody.
Do not spiral. Save it for later.
Save it for Skylar and Devyn.
I text my best friend, telling her I’ll be back in Isleton in a few hours, not caring how expensive ordering a ride back from the packhouse will be.
Especially when I open the rideshare app and see the obscene number of credits thatsomebodydeposited into my account.