Page 58 of Knot a Bad Idea

“Fuck,” I growl, fixing my tie one last time.

We have a charity event, one that April was supposed to accompany us to, but now I don’t even know if she’ll fucking show up.

I mean, sheshould,because of the contract, but if I were her, I would kick us to the curb permanently.

What Donovan said to her and what he made her believe was un-fucking-forgivable.

I catch Liam’s worried eyes in the reflection of the mirror. He stands behind me, arms crossed. He must have come in when I was lost in thoughts of ways to murder my pack leader.

“Do you think she’ll come?” he asks quietly.

I close my eyes and sigh deeply. “Fuck, I hope so. But I wouldn’t, if I were her.”

Liam nods. “She’s better than us, though.”

He looks just as awful as I feel. I doubt he’s been sleeping much since April left the packhouse. I’ve tried to cheer him up and keep his anxiety from turning into something much worse, but I’m barely keeping it together myself.

“Yeah, she is,” I mutter. “Much better than us.”

“She’ll honor the contract.” Liam grimaces at the word and shakes his head. “Donovan should never have drafted that fucking thing.”

Speaking of Donovan, I’ve barely seen the asshole for the last few days. He disappears for hours at a time, and when he’s in the house, I don’t even look at him.

I can only assume he’s working at the office or in the studio.

If I didn’t know any better, I would assume the fucker was being eaten alive by guilt, though. When Ihaveseen him, he looks like he’s fucking dying. I’ve also caught him mumbling to himself a few times, which is bizarre, even for him.

But whatever he is going through, he deserves it. I hope that fucking guilt consumes him.

We’re not even arriving at the event together like we normally do. Liam and I are taking a separate car just so I don’t have to be in an enclosed space with Donovan for long.

“Fuck the contract,” I mutter for the thousandth time. “It was pointless and the worst fucking thing that asshole ever did to us.”

“I hate this,” Liam murmurs after a moment of silence. “I know that giving her space is the right thing to do, but ithurts. Is it supposed to hurt like this?”

I like to think I have some semblance of emotional maturity, but I don’t have the answers my best friend needs.

Especially when I couldn’t give April the space she needed. I showed up at her door like a psycho.

“I think it does when you’ve found your mate,” I answer carefully.

He leans against the doorway and closes his eyes. “Fuck this,” he says finally.

That’s how I can tell this is really messing him up, too. He’s saidfuckmore in the past week than I’ve heard him say it in all the years I’ve known him.

I want to tell him it will be okay, but I don’t fucking know if that’s true.

I don’t know how to repair any of this, or win April over without making her push further away.

Maybe Donovan isn’t the only one that needs to work on his shit.

“I think he’s been visiting his mother,” Liam says finally. I turn to face him, leaning against the sink counter.

I frown. “Who?”

“Donovan.”

I shrug. “Okay?And? Why the fuck do I care if he’s feeling sorry for himself at a cemetery?”