Page 87 of Knot a Bad Idea

I don’t believe in fate.

I didn’t believe in anything until April Waters waltzed into my life, handing me a cookie and seeing through my bullshit.

Maybe I’m scared, angry, or insane.

Possibly all three.

I shouldn’t be having auditory hallucinations of her voice.

I shouldn’t be replaying her smile over in my head or remembering her squeals of joy when she wins a fuckingkitten-themed board game.

And I probably shouldn’t have paid to have someone killed.

“Do you ever stop and think that maybe you’ve become a better person because of her?”

Liam threw question after question at me, and I refused to answer any of them.

Because he’s fuckingright.

April has challenged the very core of who I am.

I knew who I was before her—a cold, hard-working asshole.

Someone that couldn’t be a good partner, or even a good son.

Barely a friend.

But I knew who I was, and April makes me fucking questioneverything.

How could someone go through what she’s been through and come out the other side stronger than before?

How can she make Liam’s anxiety dissipate when no one else can?

She melted Hunter’s shitty attitude and turned him into a dark Prince Charming.

And she’s made mewant.

Apparently, I can’t fucking handle it, especially when she never gave me her answer the other night.

I know I didn’t have the right to ask if she was willing to try again with me, but I still did.

Her silence told me everything.

Of course, she wouldn’t want to try with me after how I treated her.

I talk to her in riddles half the time—the bigger my feelings grow for her, the more difficult it is for me to open up.

Still, with that one text message she sends me, I hurry back to the packhouse, consequences be damned.

I’ll hang on every fucking word she says, even if it’s just to tell me to go fuck myself, and that she only wants Liam and Hunter.

At least I won’t be a coward about it.

The keys to our external office are attached to a large keyring that I keep in my pocket. It has every key on it, including the ones to the bedrooms in the house. I usually don’t keep the massive thing on me, but I grabbed them in a hurry to end the argument with Liam.

I use that set of keys to unlock the door to the packhouse and hurry inside.

April’s scent perfumes the foyer, and an irrational stab of jealousy rushes through me.