Page 49 of Savage
He dropped his face into his hands, kept it there for a couple of moments and she wondered what he was thinking. After a moment he let out a low growl and scrubbed his hands over his face before sitting up and turning to look at her. Her hand slid off his back as he moved. Not knowing what else to do with it, she brought it back and let both hands rest in her lap.
“I’m not entirely sure how we got here, babe. I picked up a girl who needed some help. I never thought I’d end up catching feelings, much less falling this quick or this hard.” He reached out and picked up her hand, enveloping it in both of his. “I never thought I’d have anyone but my brothers. I didn’t think it was possible for someone to work their way, not just into my heart but into my soul, especially to get so deep in so little time. But you’ve done it. I don’t know what I’d do without you. I don’t know that I want to find out.” He took a deep breath and let it out in a rush, as if he was cleansing himself of something, but she couldn’t tell what. “Before I met you, I didn’t have a plan. I floated from day to day, working and helping my club. I lived to have fun, drink a little, fight a little and ride a lot. But then I was out for a run one day and met this little bit of a spitfire. And without knowing it, my world changed.” He shook his head.
Donna didn’t know what to say. Somehow, in a very brief time, she’d come to not just rely on Savage but to trust him too. She curled her fingers into his until they wove their fingers together.
“When I left Noah, I had no idea what I was going to do. I had no idea how I would live, much less take care of a baby. I thought I might have to either give up the baby or terminate, not that I want to do that, but I thought it might be my only option. I believed then, and I believe now, that even that was a better option than raising a child to think that kind of life, that living with the kind of abuse I was dealing with, was normal. I’m glad I don’t have to make that choice.” She used her free hand to scrub across her eyes, then pinch the bridge of her nose as she tried to find the words to tell him the rest of her thoughts.
“Oh, God, babe. I’m glad you don’t either.” He pulled her into his arms, settling her on his lap.
He held her with strong but gentle arms. One hand wrapped around her, so she felt like no matter what came, what trials they faced, she was safe. He’d make sure she stayed that way, the other resting low on her belly.
“If you decide you can’t do it. That you just can’t live with having this baby, I’ll support you. I’ll do whatever you need to get you through it. You want to keep on the way you’re going, you want to keep and raise this baby and I’ll back that. I’ll raise it the same as if it had my DNA. Just say the word, babe, and I’ll make you both mine. We need to check and see if you actually are married according to the state, and if the state says yes, get that terminated as quickly as possible.”
“Why?” she asked with a frown. She wasn’t going to argue. She didn’t want to be tied to Noah any more than it seemed Savage wanted it, but she didn’t know why, and she needed to know.
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Savage’schestachedandhis stomach churned. He’d already said way more than he’d planned to, and now she wanted more. Not that he could blame her. She had a lot going on and more in sight down the road.
“I want to make sure you’re free to do whatever you want. I have a couple ideas of what I’d like you to do, but I’ve already told you I won’t force you,” he said, enjoying the reassuring weight of her in his arms and on his lap.
“What is it you’d like me to do?” Her voice had gone husky, making parts of his body pay attention.
Down boyhe told his dick as he reminded himself she just got out of a bad situation. She wouldn’t want to jump into the kind of commitment he wanted. He could take it slow. But his head had a deadline, and maybe it would be better to start getting her used to the idea.
“I’m not sure I should say.” He paused, watching her face. “I don’t want to scare you and I’m afraid what I want will do just that.”
“I’m not as easily frightened as the last few days make me look. Tell me what you’re thinking,” she met his gaze, “please.”
How could he deny her when she looked at him all wide eyed and innocent. She wasn’t innocent. She’d been through too much for that but that look made his protective instincts come to the surface, and they weren’t very far away to begin with.
“I want us to get married.” He continued before she had a chance to say anything or even think up an argument. “I’m not saying now but I want it soon. I want you carrying my name before this one is born.” He pressed gently against her belly. “I want neither of you to have any doubt how I feel about you. I don’t want either of you to doubt I’ll always take care of you both.”
She stared at him for several seconds. He waited for her to say something, anything, then he noticed tears pooling in her eyes. When one spilled over and trailed down her cheek, he wiped it away with his thumb.
“Babe, please don’t cry. I didn’t say it to make you cry. I know you’re not ready for something like that, not yet. But I had to say it. I had to let you start getting used to the idea. Because if I get my way, that’s what’s going to happen, and I’m going to do everything I can to make sure it does. Well, everything that you’ll let me.”
“I want to believe. I want to say yes and just be happy, but I can’t.” Her hand came up to cover his where he cupped her belly. “It’s too much, too soon. I can’t trust it. Can you give me time? Time to heal and learn to trust myself again?”
“Babe,” he ran the back of one finger along her jaw, “I’d wait a lifetime if you’d just say yes. I don’t want to rush you into anything you’re not ready for. I want you to be as sure as I am. I didn’t lie when I said I want you both to have my name but if you’re not ready by then, it’s not a deal breaker.”
“Thank you.” She threw her arms around his neck and hugged him. “I feel like all I say to you is thank you and that you’ll get tired of hearing it, but I just can’t say enough how much I appreciate everything you’re doing for me.” She released his neck and leaned back to once more cover his hand where it still sat on her tummy. “For both of us. Are you sure you want to take on a baby that’s not yours?” Her voice trembled on that last, and it only made Savage more certain.
“I’m not sure I’ve ever been more certain of anything in my life. And along that line, we’ve got a guy back in Tucson who can do a little research and find out if you’re going to have to file for divorce. Let me message him and get him started on that. That way, we’ll know for sure either way by the time we get there. If it turns out you do, then I have no doubts one of the brothers will know of an attorney we can contact to get that done.” He kept one arm around her as he used his other hand to dig his phone out of his pocket.
With Donna still in his lap, he typed out a message to Gizmo, outlining what they needed, and giving him all the pertinent information, like full names and dates of birth for both Donna and the waste of skin that was her ex, as well as Donna’s social security information. He would have included the duck fucker’s, but she didn’t know it.
He’d sent the message and was sitting with Donna in his lap, his forehead pressed to hers, where they’d been for several minutes when she spoke up.
“Are we good?” she asked. “Or are you still mad at me?”
“We’re good, babe, and I wasn’t mad, at least not at you. I was gutted by what you said, and furious at him that he’d made you that desperate to get away. But I wasn’t mad at you.” He said all this without moving, his head still pressed against hers, as if he needed the contact to remind himself she was safe and not going anywhere.
“Good. I kind of hate to spoil the mood, but I need to find a bathroom. I’ve got to go. And I’m getting hungry again.”
“All right, we’ve got goals then.” He helped her to her feet and with only a little investigation, they found the bathroom. While she was inside, his phone vibrated, and thinking Gizmo had worked his magic fast, Savage pulled it out to check what he’d found.
The message wasn’t from Gizmo.