Page 44 of Toxic Devotion

He crossed the room, feeling the tension coming off Cade though the man didn’t move even as Marco grasped him by the chin. He stared into Cade’s eyes, looking for any reason not to trust him. He wasn’t sure if he should be relieved or disappointed when all he saw was a man of integrity.

He let go of Cade and stepped back to lean against his desk, his body feeling heavy. Everything had been feeling heavy lately. The only thing that… no. Neil was nothing to him. He was simplya means to an end. The love he’d felt for him was gone. It had to be.

“I’ll get you in. Even if I don’t understand why he needs you to do it when he’s got all his fancy spook friends who are actually trained for shit like this,” he said, the dark tone of his voice betraying the anger he felt.

“I asked to go under. I knew something more was going on. Neil confirmed it by showing up and getting involved.”

The name made him flinch ever so slightly. Cade clearly noticed it and he wanted to curse the man but swallowed back those words that would only confirm his reaction.

Cade licked his lips, caution in his eyes as he said, “Whatever happened between you two?”

“Is over. It’s done with. He’s CIA and I’m a god damned mobster. The family is my life, and he lives for taking down people like me. There’s nothing more between us and you’d do best to remember that.”

He didn’t want Cade digging deeper. He didn’t want Cade to know the truth; that he’d let the man into his life and because of it, he’d lost his sister. That he was the guilty one.

Cade dropped his gaze to the floor, his shoulders hunching. His voice was low as he asked, “You think you don’t deserve to be loved?”

Marco straightened. Cade wasn’t talking about him. Or even Neil. Whatever was going on with Cade, it had the man doubting himself.

“Don’t you dare compare either of us with you. You turned your life around. You’re a good guy. You always were,” Marco said.

“So are you,” Cade said, meeting Marco’s gaze with a raised chin.

He knew the man believed it but just because you believe something, it doesn’t make it the truth. He knew that all too well.

“No. I am not a good guy, Cade.”

“Sure, you are. If you weren’t, you wouldn’t be doing this. You’re putting your life on the line. You’re trusting me to either succeed or make sure nothing comes back to you if I don’t.”

He gave Cade a pointed look and said, “Trust doesn’t come easy for me.”

“I know.” Cade nodded. “Thank you.”

The second Cade was out the door, he dropped his head back with a groan. He rubbed the bridge of his nose, willing his budding headache to go the fuck away.

“You’re lucky I trust him more than I trust you,” he said.

Neil stood in the doorway, an emptiness in his eyes Marco knew all too well.

“Oh, I know,” Neil said and stepped into the office and closed the door behind him.

Marco sat up straight. He tracked the man’s every step as he crossed the room.

“Are you going to tell me what this whole thing is about?”

Neil’s mask of indifference slipped and as the man ran his hands down his face, Marco saw the weariness weighing Neil’s body.

“Hughes?” Marco asked.

Neil nodded. “One of my Marines, the detective, he’s here. He’s working with Cade.”

Marco cocked a surprised brow at Neil. “You don’t sound too happy about it?”

Neil swallowed, his Adam’s apple moving up and down and Marco found himself unable to look away, something dark and hungry awakening inside of him. Something he tried to contain around Neil, but so far he hadn’t been successful.

“I fear what it’ll lead to.”

Marco snorted and stood, arms crossing as he pinned Neil with a hard stare. “What? The truth?”