Page 43 of Born Reckless
"Your father is still alive."
Those five words make me feel like I am full of ice-cold water.
"I see no traces of him," Malcolm says. "So, whoever he is, he’s still out there. Alive."
I don't know why the news feels so shocking. It was only ever my mother who was found dead beside me. They searched for my father, and even though they didn't find him, that certainly doesn't mean that he's dead. But still, that knowledge sends goosebumps flashing down my spine.
"But your mother…" Malcolm says. There's something about his tone. About the way he trails off. He pauses for a long moment and in my mind, all I see is a gray wall. As if he just hit pause on whatever is happening.
And then, clear as day, I hear his voice, but not through my ears.
He speaks directly into my mind.
“How much do you want him to know?”It's exactly the same. But it is definitely not the same experience as hearing him speak."Mason? There's something… I've never seen something like this. How much do you want him to know?"
I'm barely breathing. Just shallow intakes of air and shaky exhales.
"Juliet?"Malcolm presses in my mind once again.
"I…"I stumble. The words do not come over my lips. But I know that Malcolm hears them."I don't want him knowing anything that will make him look at me any different."
"Mason," this time Malcolm speaks out loud. "I'm getting some interference. Would you mind stepping outside? I think that might help."
He says it so smoothly and professionally, I don't doubt what he says. It's as if Mason is scrambling a satellite signal. And Malcolm is simply asking him to give us a moment to see if we can fix the problem.
"Of course," Malcolm says. My eyes are still closed. Still, all I see is that gray wall. But I hear Mason as he steps across the room and opens the door. A second later, that bell rings once again as the door closes.
"Sorry about that," Malcolm says, once again speaking out loud. "I just… considering what I'm seeing in here, I thought maybe you might want this to stay private."
And that gray wall in front of me suddenly dissolves. And it's as if I'm watching a movie and suddenly the camera zooms in. I see a baby lying on the ground next to a woman. I see no evidence of damage to her. I see no blood, no puncture wounds, or bullet holes. But she lies there, still and cold. Her eyes stare up into the sky vacantly.
Her hair is blonde, and her features are delicate. Her eyes are blue.
Her face is frozen in an expression of worry and terror.
That’s her. Even if I didn’t believe Malcolm was the real deal, I would still know this is in fact my mother. She looks… she looks just like me.
And for the first time, I see the face of the woman who carried and gave birth to me.
The baby is screaming.I’mscreaming. Crying. The clouds overhead are beginning to open.
My chest is tight. My heart is racing so fast I can barely think straight.
They told me that I’d been found beside my mother, in the rain.
Here it is. I see it. I’m witnessing it.
And then the scene in front of me begins to rewind. I watch as the baby goes still with a squirm. She and the woman lie there in the dirt next to the highway, quiet.
My heart jumps into my throat when a man with evil in his eyes walks backward out of a cornfield. He crosses to the woman, and in reverse, I watch her rise from the ground, the baby flying back into her arms. The man’s hand comes to her throat, and I watch as the life comes back into her eyes.
I feel emotions trying to choke me. Moisture pools in them and it’s everything I can do not to let them fall.
He’s killing her.
This man, he’s choking my mother to death, and I’m watching it happen.
An evil, eerie green light emanates from his hands. The woman's eyes are wide with fear. I see his lips moving, but I cannot hear what he's saying.