Page 103 of Just One Moment
KnowingQuinnhas a friend likeJohannato turn to is a small comfort.
“She’sokay.”Hetakes in my slouched posture and grim demeanor. “Looksabout as gutted as you are though.Areyou going to tell me what happened, or doIhave to piece it together myself?”
Patricksighs at my resounding silence.
“Doyou remember those few monthsIwas struggling with managing the restaurant and raising a newborn?Youpushed and pushed me to take a break.Todelegate tasks to other people.Evenslept at my house for an entire week soIcould sleep.Youpissed me off because you wouldn’t leave, andIwas so grateful to you for it.Sowe can sit here all day until we’re frozen, butI’mnot leaving, you surly bastard.”
Thecorners of my mouth twitch.
“Youcan’t keep living with the regrets of yesterday.That’swhatDadwould have said to you.Youalso can’t keep regretting your relationship withJenna.It’sdone.Over.Quinnisnothinglike her.Thefact that she’s putting you above your relationship, and her happiness, says that.”
“Itold herIcouldn’t understand it.”Myvoice is strained after not speaking for so long.
“Understandwhat?”Heleans forward to hold my gaze.
“Whatshe sees in me.Howshe can love me.Myhead was fucked after her andJenna’sconversation.”
“Gray—”Myflinch cuts him off. “WhatdidIsay?”
Myfingers flex in my gloves butIknowIneed to be honest with him. “Ihate being calledGray.”
Hishead rears back, brows furrowing underneath his hat. “Sincewhen?We’vecalled you that for as long asIcan remember.”
“Jenna.Thelast thing she said to me before she walked out was, ‘There’sa reason everyone calls youGray.It’sfitting: dull, boring, and emotionless.’Lastnight she pretty much said the same toQuinn.”
“Fuckinghell, she really is something.It’sa good thingQuinnwouldn’t believe a word that comes out of that snake’s mouth.”
Myshoulders droop andIslide down the bench.
Hegroans and scrubs a hand down his face. “Whyon earth wouldQuinnever think that?Sheloves you so much.It’swhat she kept saying as she sobbed her way through our front door.Christ,Graham, are you really that blind?”
“Yes!”Ishout, the sudden outburst causing a flock of gulls to scatter as my voice ricochets around us.
Patrickdoesn’t ask me to clarify, he just waits.LikeBooth, he knows not to rush me.
“Shestood up for me, which should be mortifying.Iregret howIhandled it, butIwas so fucking scared afterJennasaid those things to her.Ihated howIcouldn’t stand up for myself, or see pastJenna’swords, thatIclammed up.”
“Doyou believe it?WhatJennasaid?”
“Upuntil this fall, yes.”Iswallow. “Notanymore.”
“Idon’t know how to help you fight those demons.Quinnis crazy about you.I’mso happy she’s in your life and sees you for who we’ve always seen.Me,Booth,Florence,Mom.Maybewe should have told you more often.”Hegrabs me by the shoulderand pulls me into a hug, the sudden act bringing on a whole new wave of emotions. “Welove you, for exactly who you are.AndifDadwere here today, he’d say the same.BelievethatQuinnloves you for you.”Webreak apart. “Ifyou don’t, you’re going to lose her.Trustthis from the guy who spent years dancing around the woman he loved.Whenyou have her, you don’t let her go.”
“Idon’t know what to do.Ican’t change howIfeel about myself overnight.”
“It’snot about change.Ifanything, you need to showQuinnyou understand why she loves you.Proveto her that you’re working on it.”
Hemakes it sound so easy.
Wesettle with our backs against the bench, the cold bite of the wood seeping through my jeans.Hestays with me, though, as the minutes pass.
“Dadwould tell me to write this all down,”Ieventually say.
“Hewas smart.Knewwhat we needed to hear at just the right time.”Heshuffles back and pulls out a wad of envelopes from his coat pocket and looks at them longingly. “Rightafter we found out about the restaurant being sold, his words turned out to be exactly whatIneeded to read.Iplanned on giving these to you all atChristmas.Idon’t know what it says, but something tells me you need his words right now.”
Hepresses the papers into my hands. “Theother two are forBoothandFlorence.Ithink you should be the one to give them theirs—when they need it the most.”Hestands and brushes the snow from his pants. “Doyou want me to say anything toQuinnwhenIsee her?”
Somuch.Butshe needs assurances now, not excuses. “Tellher that when we see each other next, it’s going to be one for the record books.”