Page 57 of The Midnight Arrow

I didn’t know how long it would work. But I would wake up every hour in the dead of winter if it meant saving them. I owed it to them.

Walking through the Black Veil now, I wondered what I would do in a few weeks when the sun would set long before my shift at the guild hall ended.

Veras had said that more and more Shades were roaming the Black Veil, and while I had yet to encounter one on my walks home, I knew it might only be a matter of time. I’d always seen them, here and there. They stayed far away, and I knew that Peek would protect me. But knowing that there was unrest in the Below, that Lorik was frightened about something…it had made me uneasy every single night.

I never breathed a sigh of relief until I stepped beyond Peek’s boundary, and I wondered if I should start bringing him into Rolara with me for extra protection come winter.

Peek might even like it,I thought. He could wander the streets and spy on people while I worked in the guild hall.

A branch snapped in the Black Veil, and I froze on the path, my heart pounding in my chest. My hand went to the dagger I kept hidden at my hip, curling my fist around the hilt.

I scanned the darkening forest without moving my head, my eyes darting back and forth between the wide tree trunks, trying to look for shadows that might be unnatural.

“It’s only me,” came the voice. “Don’t worry. The branch was more brittle than it appeared.”

My heart squeezed in my chest, a jolt of sorrow and heartache hitting me harder than I’d thought possible.

Lorik.

“Have you been following me this whole time?” I asked, not bothering to raise my voice, looking in the direction I thought he might’ve been hiding.

“I just want to make sure you get home safely.”

“This is ridiculous,” I said, my hand dropping away from the dagger. “Why are you hiding?”

“Because you said you never wanted to see me again.”

I pressed my lips together. Yes, he was right about that.

“And you won’t—I promise,” Lorik continued. “I just wanted you to know that you have nothing to fear in the Black Veil, Marion. I’ll always make sure Shades stay away from your path.”

I didn’t reply, and Lorik said nothing else. I continued on, winding my way home even as my mind raced. I felt flustered, knowing he was watching me, watchingoverme. How long had he done this without me knowing?

And if it thawed a tiny part of my icy heart, I ignored it.

Twenty-Three

Over the course of the next few days, I found myself taking Lorik’s words to heart. Because, it seemed, one part of me still trusted that he would keep me safe, despite what had happened between us.

Gone were the nerves that entered my chest whenever I was beyond Peek’s protection. Instead, I felt a fluttering kind of awareness,knowingthat Lorik was out there, even though I could not see him.

I struggled between trying to ignore that newfound knowledge…and also smoothing down my hair whenever I left my cottage and whenever I entered the Black Veil after my time in Rolara. It was frustratingly ridiculous. How could I be torn between heartbreak over his terrible betrayal while also wanting to lookprettyfor him? I was out of my mind, I’d finally decided, even as I picked out my best dresses that didn’t have holes in them.

I still hadn’t decided if I’d forgiven Lorik or not. I believed what he’d said. I truly did. And knowing that…I felt it was coldheartednotto forgive him for it. Yes, he had lied to me, used me to get the shadevine-hive heart.

But I also recognized that not only would I want to help my people if they were sick…I would literally do anything to save mysister. I would have doneanythingto save her. If I could have traded my life for hers…I would have.

Knowing that, did that change how I felt about what had happened between us in the aftermath? After the heat of the moment had passed and I could reflect on it with calmness and logic?

Of course it did.

However, I just didn’t see how it would change anything between us. We’d been doomed from the start. He was a Kelvarian, the Below King’s Hunter, and he would never be accepted in the Above world without his magicked glamour—not that he would ever leave his home.

And I could never leave mine. All we would have were stolen moments, like the ones we’d had before, until he was called away again by the magic embedded into his wrist.

And though I’d pushed my own dreams for the future down deep, I realized I wanted a family. I wanted to be loved, and I wantedtolove. I wanted a partner in this life, one who was kind and caring. I wanted children.

Despite whether I forgave Lorik for what had happened, I didn’t think he could give me that.