Page 19 of Break Me
“What are you doing?” I croak as he grabs a sterile package—that is not simply disinfectant wipes—and rips it open. The sight of a needle so thick I can see the hollow tunnel has me jerking against the restraints, whipping my head from side to side. “No, no, no, no, no.”
“Look at me,” Dax growls, slamming his palm onto my mound.
The shock knocks me out of the spiraling fear, and I breathe hard as I lift my head and stare at him.
“You don’t belong to yourself anymore,” he says with a fierce expression that shoves straight past my defenses, making his words seem like the most important thing in the world. “Your pussy is not yours to use, not yours to control, so I’m piercing it shut.”
My breathing speeds up to a shallow rhythm that sends a wave of dizziness to my brain.
“Say the words.” He tightens his hand, and sensation shudders through my nerves as the pressure draws through my clit. “I am a precious…”
I repeat and finish the sentence he has embedded deep into my brain.“I am a precious little submissive who is going to make my trainer very proud.”
“Good.Now, this will hurt, and it’s going to hurt for a while. But if you’d like, I can help you handle the pain. Would you like that?”
Confusion has me jerking my head as I say through bated breaths, “Yes, of course.”
He slides his hand down my newly shaven skin, dragging his index finger between my folds.
“Ah,” I gasp as he slides over my overly sensitive clit. It hasn’t been touched once since I came here, and it’s like a flare of fire. The sensations keep bursting into my nerve endings as he drags his finger along, and I pant as I stare at him with wide eyes. When his fingertip slides off my clit and he lifts it to start over, Iremember I shouldn’t like any of this. “No, don’t touch me,” I say.
“It’s the only way to relieve the pain. I’m not gonna sedate you. I want you awake for this. So, do you want me to touch you or not?”
Once again, he has caught me in an impossible dilemma. If I agree, it will chip away at my self-respect, which is already fading; if I don’t agree, I’m facing hell. I’m not good with pain—never have been—and the mere idea of that needle is almost enough to hurl me straight back to the edge of panic.
“I can’t decide,” I say, once again baring myself with frightening clarity to the man who is my captor and soon to be my sexual perpetrator—or the man I unwillingly asked to touch me.
“Do you want me to decide how this goes for you?” he asks, surprisingly calm.
Biting my lip, I nod. It’s easier to live with myself if he forces it upon me.
“Are you gonna be a good little sub and do as I say then?”
I nod again.
“I want you to ask me nicely to touch your sweet little nub while I pierce your pussy shut, and when I’m done, I want you to thank me for making sure you can’t touch what doesn’t belong to you.”
“No! That’s not—” I stare at him in outrage, feeling deceived.
He lifts an eyebrow. “That’s not fair? You said you wanted me to decide how this goes, and this is how I want it.”
I shake my head, wanting to scream, but his words keep swirling in my mind.A good little sub. Wanting to please. Doing what he says.
I don’t want to do this, yet all my instincts scream for me to obey as I watch him, melting beneath his demanding stare and losing myself to make room for his dominance.
He presses a finger to the spot right above my clit. Fire bursts through my nerves at that little touch, heating the place that has been numb and cold for days. It’s like he has lit a spark, and that spark keeps growing as he shoves his way past my defenses.
A tremor has me twitching against the restraints, making me all too aware of the straps. They’re everywhere. Around my stomach, under my chest, over my arms, and over my legs. Gripping tight against my skin. I can’t move anything besides my outermost extremities and my head. Because he doesn’t want me to.
“You don’t belong to yourself,” he says softly, punctuating the message going through my brain.
I sink into the chair, my muscles going loose and pliant. “I don’t belong to myself,” I say so weakly the words barely leave my mouth.
But he hears it, and a smile softens his hard features. “No, you don’t. And now you’re gonna say what I want to hear.”
“Please touch me,” I whisper, and in that moment, there’s nothing I want more. I want to feel his touch down there. I want him to exert his devastating control over me as he ignites my desire. And maybe I even want him to pierce my pussy shut.
I don’t know; I don’t care. I can’t think as he slides a finger over my clit, drawling, “Good girl.”