Page 36 of Drowned In Silence

“Yes, Elliot. Please make me come,” I beg.

When the lightning flashes in warning, my breathing stops. He bends over and bites my nipple, tugging it with his teeth, and rubbing my clit with his thumb.

I shatter when the thunder hits. Elliot pushes down with his thumb, making the pressure almost too much, his fingers sliding in and out of me.

“Fuck!” I scream. I can hear him groan as he lets go of my nipple and slowly removes his fingers.

“Look at the mess you made, Dynah,” he says, pulling his hand out from the blankets and spreading his fingers. My arousal is evident, dripping down his hand. I can’t even say anything before he sticks one finger in his mouth, leaving theother three still wet. The groan he makes as he tastes me, almost makes me come again. When he pulls his finger out, he smiles devilishly. “Open your mouth.”

I do as he demands, and he sticks the remaining three fingers in my mouth.

“Good girl. Do you taste how wet you are for me?” He pulls his fingers out after I suck everything off them, swirling my tongue around and licking every last drop. When he is done, he wraps his tattooed hand around my throat, not cutting off air flow, but letting it rest there. “You’re perfect.”

He leans down and presses his lips against mine. I’m shocked, but I try not to show it. I haven’t kissed anyone in a very, very long time. His tongue prods my lips open and I allow it, tasting myself on his lips. He groans and finally pulls away, adjusting himself and laying on his side.

I’m once again breathless from this man. It makes me feel like I’m drowning– drowning in emotion, confusion, and helplessness.

I fear that I am going to fall off my high horse and allow him to call me his.

“What about you?” I ask. I know men get blue balls and I feel like I need to reciprocate.

“I told you, Little Raven. This isn’t about me. I’m okay.” He pulls my body to him, rolling over and forcing my head to his chest, hearing his heartbeat race beneath me. “I just need this. Now, go to sleep. I got you.”

I don’t have any fight left in my body. My hand slides onto his chest, covering his heart as my eyes fall closed.

“Goodnight, Elliot.”

“Goodnight, my Little Raven. Goodnight.”

Cramps

Dynah

I pry my eyesopen and turn away from Elliot, checking the time on the alarm clock next to the bed. It reads 3am, and I try not to groan aloud. Why am I always waking up during the witching hour? I feel like I’m cursed or something.

I have fucking cramps. Throwing the covers off of me gently, I slip out of bed and into the bathroom. I don’t want to wake him up for this.

It’s been years since my last period. Malnutrition will fuck your body up more than you know. The cramps are intense, like a tidal wave of pain washing over me. I strip off my clothes, noticing that I got blood on the pants.

Dammit.

I turn on the shower as hot as I can stand it without burning my skin. This isn’t like last time. I’m not trying to harm myself, I’m trying to relieve the pain not cause it. It’sweird how your life acts like a mirror, always reflecting the past, yet simultaneously changing the future.

Pulling my knees to my chest, I rock back and forth, trying not to cry.

I’ve experienced plenty of pain before, but this is different. Usually I dance in the pain, revel in it, hide behind it, and force it to go away. I can’t do that this time, this pain comes within my body instead of the recesses of my subconscious. My uterus is trying to purge itself, clawing my insides, and ruining my mood.

“Dynah? We aren’t doing this again are we?” Elliot walks in and asks. He crosses his arms and leans against the sink.

“No,” I cry. “I– um… I’m fine.”

“No you aren’t. Why are you crying?” He opens the shower door and squats down so he is face to face with me. “What's wrong?” His eyes trail my body, inspecting me and making sure I’m okay. When his eyes look towards my thighs, the realization crosses his face. “Oh.”

“I’m fine! Just… Just get out,” I whimper, still rocking back and forth.

“I’ll be right back. I’m not leaving because you told me too, but I’ll be back.”

“Whatever, just go!” I raise my voice in pain, still crying.