Page 46 of Despair

She shook her head against his chest. He cupped the back of her head and stroked, uncaring of the tacky resistance from the blood. To him, it only made her more human. Vulnerable. She was a warrior, but a warrior with cracks in her armor.

“Then what? Did they do something to you… say something to you?” She refused to talk. “Daisy, tell me so I can fix it.”

She pushed away and the look on her face stabbed him in the heart.

“It’s me who’s broken. You can’t fix me.” She sniffed and wiped her nose, then picked up the motorcycle and turned it on. “Let’s go.”

Clenching his jaw, he stared at her long and hard.

“No.” He covered her hand on the throttle. “I want to know what happened.”

Eyes full of animosity slid to him. Hate like he’d never felt before speared him, yet somehow, he knew it wasn’t directed at him. But at herself.

“I happened,” she spat and waved down her bloody front. “I beat them within an inch of their life and then kept going.” Anger poured off her in waves. “I wanted him to die. I wanted them all to hurt the way I’ve been hurt. I want them all to lose. And I… I can’t stop myself. Whether you’re there or not, I can’t stop.” Her jaw clicked shut. Her expression deadpanned. She became the uncaring Falcon again. “I’m a murderer. A villain. This is me, your mate.”

“Daisy. What you’re feeling is happening to all your siblings, not just you.”

“No. They don’t do it on purpose. I do.”

“Daze—”

“Get on or walk,” she barked.

Scowling, he climbed on and wrapped his hands around her small waist. He was at a loss for words as she drove them out of the yard. She was hurting and he wanted to make it right. He wanted to fix it for her, but he was starting to see there might be nothing he could do.

Maybe it wasn’t his job to fix her.

Maybe she couldn’t be fixed.

All he knew was that he could promise her one thing. He would be there if she broke apart. Every damned time.

* * *

They arrivedat Lazarus House in the early hours before dawn. During the ride she had stayed quiet and tense. He tried to talk again when they stopped in the garage, but she walked away and didn’t look back.

Axel wasn’t sure how long he stood there, his fingers twitching at his sides, but when Mary pushed her petite body through the door leading to the basement headquarters, he jolted.

“Daisy’s back?” she asked quietly.

He nodded but couldn’t bring himself to talk. He’d failed. Wasn’t he supposed to be her balance? Wasn’t he supposed to be the one who she would go to and feel better? Maybe it wasn’t her that was broken, but him. Maybe he was blinded by his hope.

“Your sister is asleep in our apartment,” Mary said. “Come in. There’s a spot for you on the couch.”

He slumped and followed her inside, his feet dragging although he wasn’t tired. The cold, empty hallway stared at him with dark eyes, waiting and judging.

“I’m sorry, Mary,” he said as they walked through the darkened basement rooms.

“It’s not your fault. It’s mine.” The elevator doors opened to allow them entry. Once inside, she punched the button for her floor. “I made her this way. The blame rests on me.”

“But I thought Julius trained her to be like this.”

Sad eyes slid his way. “He only had control of her because I left her behind.”

“I’m sure you couldn’t help it, just as I’m sure there is more than one person to blame.”

She shrugged.

They went up the levels in silence. When they arrived at what he assumed was her floor, the doors opened and stayed open. She didn’t walk out. She took a breath and faced him.