Page 40 of Hunting the Alpha

I slammed the handset back down as if it burned, and fell back on the bed, my heart racing.

My actions today were about to ruin me for life. Once it was all over, if I survived, I’d get my uncle out of town, drop him somewhere far away, rescue Donovan’s ass, and leave Idaho for good. I was done with the place. I was done with bounty hunting. And I was done with Gideon Fucking Fletcher.

After showering and packing my meager belongings, I ate as much as I could at breakfast, even though I didn’t feel hungry. I snagged some extra cookies for later, not wanting to venture into town to grab lunch.

After that, I hid out in my room, trying to read a novel and failing. I picked up my pencils instead.

Drawing soothed my ragged thoughts. Time was no longer a concept when I sketched or painted. It was as if I fell into a black hole where only me and my imagination existed.

After almost finishing another sketch of Moonlight Creek, a knock on the door disturbed me. I opened it to see a tray on the floor filled with food. Next to it was a note:Eat up. Love Lilly.

Tears escaped before I could stop them. I fingered the note, love filling my heart as I carried the tray inside my room, nudging the door closed.

“How can I do this?” I whispered, my head hurting, pulsing with the words:You have no choice, you have no choice, you have no choice.

Numbing myself to the pain of it all yet a-fucking-gain, I picked up the tray and ate what I could, wrapping and gathering what I could take with me, shoving it into my bag.

I’d already removed the strong sedative and shoved it into my purse for later. It was one I only used under desperate circumstances, and again, something I’d got via my uncle’s dodgy channels. He’d made sure I had it on hand, wanting my safety above all else.“If things are going sour, Savvy,”he’d told me,“drop this in their drink. It’s strong enough to knock out a horse.”

Now I’d be using it to knock out Donovan.

Stop it. And accept it.

It was almost time. I stayed focused on the task at hand, ignoring all the shit that could go wrong. And also accepting that nothing would ever happen between me and Donovan. For even if it all went in my favor, and I rescued the man after selling him out, there’d be no way he’d ever forgive me.

There’d be no way I’d ever forgive myself.

After falling into a dreamless sleep, exhausted from my thoughts and emotions, my cell alarm rang, waking me up, and announcing it was time to get ready.

I showered and got dressed in the clothes I’d laid out for our date. Once finishing my hair and makeup, I snuck out to my truck and shoved in my belongings before Donovan arrived.

I was ready to go.

Now I just had to survive the night without crumbling into a pile, and sobbing like a wet blanket for the rest of my life.

I chose flat sandals to go with my jeans. Heels wouldn’t help when I had to pile Donovan into my truck after the inevitable.

Nausea hit at such a thought, but I swept it aside.Keep going, one foot in front of the other. Just keep going.

Now it was just a case of grabbing my purse, keys, and meeting Donovan outside.

“You look beautiful,” he told me when I laid eyes on him. He leaned against my truck, looking too damn sinful, and I naturally responded to the hunger in his eyes.

“Thank you.” I approached him. “You don’t look bad yourself.”

He took my hand in his. “Will I see you again, Savannah? After your aunt’s funeral?”

I swallowed, ready to tell him all, everything, but I stood by my duty. “I don’t think you’ll be wanting me once I’ve gone.” I patted his arm, trying to tell him goodbye in my own way—to apologize. “Now come. Your chariot awaits, my good sir.” I rattled my keys before jumping into the truck, eager to get away from his scrutinizing gaze.

I grabbed the wheel for some sense of security, waiting for Donovan to climb into the passenger seat. After giving him a final glance, we were on our way.

He casually chatted as I drove, giving directions, ignorant to what the night would bring. I doubted I could hate myself any more than I did at that moment, listening to him, wanting to yell, to cry, to run. But I did none of those things.

Finally, I pulled into a parking spot outside The Gray Robin.

“And we’re here,” he sighed. “But before we go in. Before you say goodbye and leave tomorrow. Are there any skeletons in your closet I should know about, Savannah?”

“What? No. No skeletons.”Why ask me that?