Page 33 of The Sacrifice
“Whoa. That sounds good. Tell me more.”
“He kissed me, and it was phenomenal. The butterflies in my belly flipped and flopped, and I think my panties melted off. Then, he invited me to his room, and I freaked out. I mean, he’s had sex with many women, and my experience is not so…. Varied. Exciting. Climactic. And I assumed he wanted to let off some steam and said something he took wrong. But what do I know about having sex with someone like him? He’d get bored and sleep in the middle of it.”
“Let me get this straight. You made out with Jackson?”
“Yes. I guess. I don’t know. Shit. Yes.”Holy cow. I made out with Jackson.The room spins as dizziness floods through me. “I made out with my little brother’s best friend.”
“Ignore that last part for a second. You clearly enjoyed the moment.”
“You could say that again.” I fan my face. It feels like I’ve stepped inside of an Instant Pot. “But it’s a bad idea.”
“Why?”
“Because we’re living together. Because he has a baby. Because he’s my boss. Because I blurted out that I can’t have kids, which is awkward all on its own. Because I couldn’t keep a man like him happy. And I wasn’t planning to stay in Kansas City.”
A hush comes over the phone. “You told him about your fertility issues?”
“Yes. That’s what started the whole thing. I apologized for how I acted toward him and that I’d been jealous because he got someone pregnant without trying. I can’t have a baby.” My emotions swirl in every direction.God, this room is so small.
Why am I attracted to him? What good could come from it? Do I want something to come from it? What happens when I take my next assignment? I’m the poster child for long-distance relationships not working. And Warren and I were in the same city.
“That’s a deep subject to have with a stranger.”
I wrinkle my nose. “Jackson isn’t a stranger. I’ve known him my entire life.”
“But not as a romantic partner. Was it weird telling him something so personal?”
“No. Not really. He’s not what I expected him to be. Outside of eating Ramen and having a baby dropped on his doorstep, he’s responsible, mature, and kind.” And let’s not forget sexy as fuck.
“He sounds like perfect boyfriend material. You know how I feel about age differences. My narrow-mindedness nearly cost me the love of my life. Kevin might have been younger, but he was mature beyond his years and great with the kids from day one. Don’t push Jackson away for that reason. Age is just a number.”
I stare into the mirror at the lines around my mouth and the two at the corners of my eyes. “What happens if someone younger comes along?”
“You’re robbing the cradle even more? Who did you have in mind?”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You know I’m talking about Jackson. Warren left me for a younger woman. A fun, bubbly blonde with big tits and a tiny waist. What if Jackson gets bored and takes off with the babysitter?”
“You are the babysitter.”
What’s wrong with me? I’ve never been vain. At least, I wasn’t until now. Now my self-esteem is shot to shit. “You know what I mean. He’s a professional football star with women following him everywhere he goes. And I’d rather be organizing the kitchen cabinets.”
“Mia…” The sadness in her voice comes through the phone. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. It breaks my heart to hear you talk like you have no value. I think you should give him a shot and see what happens.”
I pinch the bridge of my nose. “What happens if I fall in love with both of them?”
“You get married and live happily ever after.”
“That’s too simple. There are so many hurdles between ten minutes ago when he kissed me and white tulle and tossed bird seed. The odds we’ll make it past second base aren’t in my favor.” I stomp to the adjoining bathroom and yank on the hot water. “Never mind. Forget I said anything. He was exhausted and has been celibate for a year. Anyone in close proximity at this point will motivate him to want to get horizontal.”
“He’s been celibate for a year?” She whistles, and I yank the phone from my ear. “That’s crazy. Girl, you’d better do him, and there’s no way it’s only going to be horizontal. I see doors, walls, and dressers. Does he have a kitchen island? That would do the trick.”
“Jade, stop.” Panic swells in my chest.
What if I never get the chance in life to have crazy, knock-your-socks-off sex? One kiss, and I was ready to sell my soul to the devil. But this is a temporary position. What happens when I move to my next assignment? What if I decide not to leave? Do I end my contract with the nanny company? How does that work? Am I his girlfriend then?
Girl, you’re getting ahead of yourself. He only offered a trip to his bedroom. Not a permanent residence at Caesar’s Palace. Stop planning the wedding.
“What are you going to do?”