Page 37 of Strongest Souls
“No.” Michael says. “Try again.”
They shove me back on to the spire. “You don’t know why I’m here.”
“We don’t need to.” Julie moves next to me, never searching for a handhold. They seem to appear beneath her fingers. “We’re not leaving you.”
“Why?”
“Because you helped us. You want to change. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t be here.”
I sigh and close my eyes. “I do want to change, but I’m not sure I deserve a new lot of friends.” The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them. “Are you my friends?”
“Of course we are.” Julie smiles.
She’s more than a friend to Joe and Theo. I can’t even think about more. “I had friends once. I was driving the car when they were killed.” I concentrate on trying to find the next handhold.
Michael moves closer. “Do you think you were to blame?”
“What is a car?” Theo asks from beneath me.
“What?” Julie swings around as though she has no fear of falling, but then she has wings. Why would she?
“I don’t know what a car is.” Theo says like that is normal. “I don’t think they were around when I was taken.”
“It’s like a horse and cart, but with an engine instead of a horse.” I’m not sure how else to explain it. It’s not something I’ve ever thought about.
“Ah.” Theo nods. “So how long have I been here?”
“At least one hundred years, possibly longer.” I climb higher, trying to imagine how much the world has changed since Theo lived there. How much has it changed since I lived there? I glance at him. “Why were you here?”
“I don’t know. I can’t remember. It doesn’t matter anymore. When I let myself feel more than anger and fear, I changed. Now I have a chance to live again. Nothing you think you have done is bad enough that you can’t leave and have a second chance.”
“Except none of my friends will ever get a second chance. They are dead.” I should have died with them.
“That is all the more reason to live. To make the most of your life so that they live on in you and in your memories.” Michael puts his hand on my shoulder and pushes away from the spire.
“He’s right,” Julie says. “Mom…the queen…she gave up when my father died. He died saving me. I don’t know if she blamed me or herself, but it consumed her. I thought the scars on my arms were from the monster that grabbed her, but they were from her refusing to let me go. If she’d been able to move on, Dad would have lived on as she told me about him.”
I barely remember their faces, but maybe when I am home, I will remember more. I’ll remember who I am. And if I don’t? If decades have passed?
Around me they talk about food, and family and other things they remember from above. Theo doesn’t say much.
“Are you worried it’s been so long?”
He shakes his head. He still doesn’t look human with his big eyes and sharp teeth. “No, because I don’t remember what my life was. I’m starting over.” He smiles, and it’s too broad. “We can find our way together.”
I glance around at my winged companions. They are keeping pace with my climb. There is no rush. The climbing becomes easier, and I start to enjoy it. I enjoy their chatter and when my skin burns as my armor melts into me, and my back erupts in wings, I welcome the change and the new adventure that awaits.
25
Julie
My wings ache as I spiral higher. I’m dizzy, like I’m about to fall out of the dark sky, but I push on. Then the weight is gone, and I’m being drawn up. The air becomes thick like treacle, and I can’t breathe. This time I don’t fight it. I let myself sink into the thick embrace.
My lungs burn for air, and I reach for the faint light. I’m home. I can feel it in my bones. My fingers hit something hard, and I pull myself up the rest of the way, only to smack my head on something.
A yelp escapes and I wriggle between the hard thing over my head and whatever is beneath my hands, I worm through the gap and out onto the floor. Then I look back. It was a bed. I crawled out from under a bed. Not just any bed, but the one I used to sleep in at Gran’s.
Her house was the only home I remembered.