Page 23 of Merciless

Elizabeth turned towards her son, “He went into a burning house because of her.”

So that’s what this was all about. I laughed. Elizabeth looked confused.

“I’m sorry, Elizabeth, but you got it all wrong. Me staying here would be a disaster.”

“OK, then. No worries,” Elizabeth smiled. “Thank you for listening anyway.” She grabbed her phone, “I’ll book you a seat on the next flight to Seattle.”

“No,” I shook my head and smiled. I could be nice if I wanted to. And right now I wanted to. I needed her to let me go without resistance. “I’m not going to Seattle.”

“Sorry, sweetheart. Your father was very clear about it,” she grinned. “If you refuse to stay here, I have to buy you a ticket for the next plane and make sure you board it. And I always keep my promises.”

An hour and a half later I was lying on the floor in Elizabeth Cole’s guest room, looking at the ugliest chandelier I had ever seen in my life. The carpet was comfy though.

It was a typical guest room. Definitely designed for grown-ups. There was a big double bed, two night stands, a big closet that I couldn’t fill in, since the clothes I currently had, a pair of jeans and two shirts, were borrowed. I got my phone out of my pocket and wrote Hannah a message:

Clem: We have to go shopping. I want my own clothes.

I ignored her one thousand messages concerning my whereabouts. I still wasn’t sure that I would stay. Or that we would go shopping together for that matter.

I couldn’t bring myself to lie on the bed. I considered it a decision-making act. Decision to stay here and accept what others had planned for me. My father’s rules for me staying in California. Elizabeth Cole’s agenda for me staying at her home.

These plans weren’t what I wanted for myself. I had no desire whatsoever to please my father. I’d had enough of his hands off parenting approach. And I had no desire to let Elizabeth Cole exploit on my family drama. I already had a controlling birth mother.

A thought was circling my mind. I could run away. I could go to Boston and stay with Tyler. He was irresponsible enough not to care about me graduating or that I was underaged. I could wait until everyone was asleep and write a note where I was going. By the time they found it, I would already be far away enough for them not to be able to bring me back.

A gentle knock on the door startled me.

“Clem? Can I come in?”

I sat up and invited her. Elizabeth smile dropped when she saw me on the floor.

“What are you… Is there a problem with the bed?”, she asked and looked sincerely perturbed.

I didn’t buy it though. Why would she be worried about me? I hurt her son.

“Yes, there is. It’s not mine. And not to sound offensive, but it’s unnatural you suggested I stay here. You must have known your son hates me. Are you trying to get back at me or something?”

She froze for a few seconds. Then she sighed and sat on the floor next to me.

“Sometimes people do things that seem unreasonable, but actually make a lot of sense. If you really think about it.”

“You want me tohealhim,” I said mockingly. “Not that I know what that even means. But that’s why you invited me here.”

“No,” she shook her head. “I invited you here because your father had no idea what to do. After I talked to him, I just couldn’t get you out of my head. I wanted to help you. At some point I saw something I could benefit from, if you stay here. Is that so bad?”

Her voice was calm and soothing. That was the reason I often imagined Elizabeth was my mother when I was a kid. She was compassionate and caring.

“I can’t do what you need me to do for him,” I said honestly. “I have no idea how.”

“I don’t want you do anything. I swear,” she paused and then continued. “He doesn’t want to fall in love, you know? And he’s leaving soon. I can’t send him off to college knowing he will continue with these meaningless relationships he has with girls. I want him to be happy. He can’t be happy if he’s scared to love. He needs to forgive you.”

I was the worst possible person for the job. Forgiveness wasn’t even in my vocabulary. But I couldn’t say it to her. That would require me to open up to someone.

No-fucking-thanks.

“I know it’s a lot to ask, but I think I could do something for you. Compensate you for your efforts,” she smiled impatiently. She was excited. I rolled my eyes. “Just look at it this way. You need something, I need something. I’m offering you a bonus for your cooperation. I’m no idiot. I know my son can be difficult.”

“What’s your offer?” I dropped my gaze to the carpet. Difficult didn’t even scratch the surface, but even I realized I kind of deserved it. The karma of me being here.