Page 62 of Beautiful Rose
We work in unison. I wash the dishes while she dries them with a kitchen towel and places them in their designated place. The entire act is so domestic that I should be running for the hills. But somehow, I’m enjoying it so much that I wish we had some more stuff to clean.
When we’re done, she passes me a towel. Before she can drop the end still in her grip, I gently tug on the soft linen. Her hands land on my chest, and her hold on me tightens as she tries to balance herself.
My breath stills, as I worry that I’ve just made another wrong move.
“What…happened?” she stammers, her gaze not wavering from my chest.
“Do you resent my touch, Marr?”
My unexpected question gets her attention, and she looks up.
God, how breathtaking she looks. Her blue eyes behind those glasses, all confused, trying to figure out the meaning behind my words. Her cheeks are scarlet, shaming the pink of her T-shirt.
“What are you saying?”
“Since last week, you’ve been avoiding me like I have cooties. And don’t say you haven’t. But today, I want to know why?”
She remains quiet, her eyes no longer on me but focused on something interesting she’s found on my tie.
“If you want our relationship to be platonic, which involves talking on the phone, random dinners, and nothing more, I’ll accept it. I like you Marr, a lot. I’m dying to have any part of your life that you want to share with me.” My grip tightens on her waist. “It’s been weeks since we declared to a room full of people that we’re together, yet you’re not comfortable with a kiss from me. If that’s something you don’t want in our relationship, please tell me. But if that’s something you fear, then talk to me.”
She flinches in my arms as frustration seeps through my words.
“I’m sorry. I don’t want to sound angry.” I ease my grip on her waist, and thankfully she doesn’t step back but remains glued in place. She doesn’t say a word, so I keep going. “I’m confused as hell, couch girl. Seeing you like this, so damn sexy—you can’t even imagine all things I want to do to you. But I’m scared shitless to even hold your hand, dreading you’ll bolt like last week. I have no idea what to do.”
She slowly rests her head on my chest. It’s the first time she’s initiated a touch, and my heart soars with happiness. I’m also apprehensive that doing anything would scare her away. And that’s when I feel the wetness on my skin—her tears soaking my shirt. Her body shudders as she sobs.
“Fuck, Marr.” I crush her in my arms. “I’m sorry. Leave it. It’s not important.” She sniffles against me, and even though I’m terrified to know her response, I ask, “Do you want me to leave?” Leaving her like this is the last thing I want to do, but I don’t even know if she wants me to stay.
“No, don’t go, please,” she whispers, shaking her head as her hands tighten on the lapels of my jacket.
Thank heavens.
“I’m scared.” Her soft voice is barely audible above my thumping heart.
“Of me?” I hold my breath. After the night Marr showed me her scars, we never talked about it. I never had the courage to bring it up, but now I fear that incident has turned her off men.
“Not you,” she whispers.
I don’t say a word, giving her a moment to gather her thoughts.
“I’ve never been close to anyone other than Kristy. I-I don’t know…how to open up to someone. And believe me, it’s not that I don’t want to share things with you.” Her breathing picks up, and she gulps loudly. “I-I’m not like other girls, Zander.”
“You’re perfect for me.” I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear as I’ve wanted to do since I stepped inside her house.
“I never had a boyfriend.” Her head drops low. She has no idea what those words do to me, but I don’t interrupt her. I silently stroke her back, begging her to continue.
“You are so…handsome and—”
“You think I’m handsome?” I can’t help the words, and the small smile that pulls up my lips.
“Everyone thinks so. I overheard Brenda from HR saying…”
“What did you hear, couch girl?”
“That you’re on some list of sexy bachelors. Nobody believes we’re together, Zander, because nobody thinks we fit together.”
My insides vibrate at those soft words. I peer down at her pretty face, scarlet as she attempts to hide away from my gaze. Tightening my grip on her, I whisper, “All I care about is if you find me sexy, Marr.”