Page 100 of Finding Fate
He groans as he jerks one side of my pants down. “God, that’s so hot.”
Before I can respond, his mouth is on mine, showing me just how turned on it has him. I don’t want this to ever change. If I have him, I have everything.
Fifty-Seven
Presley
Imindlessly scroll through my Facebook feed while I sit in the waiting room of the OBGYN clinic’s imaging department as I wait for them to call us back. I make sure to show up early. I always get a little nervous on appointment day, and today my anxiety is a little worse due to the fact that we’re finding out the sex. We get to see our baby, and as much as I hate to breed negative energy, I’m always waiting for the shoe to drop as my punishment from my previous abortion. I hate it, but I’m not sure it’ll ever completely go away.
My phone slips out of my hand as Konnor takes it from me. “Hey, jerk, what was that for?”
He smiles at me as he shoves it in his jeans pocket, knowing I’m not serious. I love that even though we’re a couple our friendship hasn’t faded. It’s actually gotten stronger, like it was when we were kids. I guess that’s what happens when you take away all the animosity we had between us from our feelings. We can still joke and name call without being petty and getting mad or taking offense. “No one in Laguna cares that you’re a Baker anymore. You’re old news, baby,” he teases, knowing I was stalking it for weeks after I changed my last name to his and my marital status from ‘in a relationship with Konnor Baker’ to ‘married to Konnor Baker’ publicly to see if people were talking trash about us. I couldn’t help it. Our coupledom has been anything but normal. But my gosh, it seems like that was forever ago.
I run my tongue over my top teeth to keep from smiling. “That’s not what I was doing. I was trying to keep my mind occupied, so I won’t worry that something is wrong.”
He slides to the edge of the chair as he leans back with his feet flat on the floor and legs spread in front of him, lacing his hands behind his head in a way that makes his tattooed biceps flex as he glances at my growing belly in my fitted top, his brows rising with mischief. He can literally do nothing and be sexy as hell. It’s a little insulting for us that work so hard for it. I know a joke is coming. After all that bragging that I could still wear my own clothes, I finally had to break down and buy some maternity clothes. The ponytail holder holding my jeans together at the button and slit wasn’t working anymore. “You look bigger, and very much pregnant. I’m going to say it’s fine.”
My jaw drops as a laugh falls out of my mouth. “You ass! Are you calling me fat?!”
He laughs back. “What? It’s getting bigger. Do you want me to lie? Not your ass. I’m talking about your stomach.”
I roll my eyes, my smile giving away that I’m not in the least offended by his brutal honesty, because even though no girlwantsto get bigger, it cuts down on my anxiety that it’s clear the pregnancy is progressing, especially since I can feel the baby move. That and the fact that we’ve had sex many times over the last few days since Gabby and Maddox came home and I told him I missed our normal sex life, despite our busy schedule, which means he’s obviously still attracted to me, belly growing and all.
Had I known one blow job would take care of that I would have taken him by surprise in the office or shower or something before. “I just don’t like the buildup before an appointment. My mind throws too many what ifs at me. Something can always happen, you know, and I feel like I need to prove myself more with this one to prove that I’m grateful for a second chance.”
He stares at me for a minute, as if he’s thinking, and then he breaks the connection of his hands and grabs mine. “Baby, give yourself a break. I’m pretty positive you already have.”
“I’m trying.”
“Speaking of the baby,” he says, changing the subject slightly from something depressing like he does so well when I’m being a downer. “Why haven’t you done a pregnancy announcement? You’ve always posted positive stuff on your Facebook. I didn’t knock you up this time, despite the fact no one aside from our families knows about that. We were trying for it. Why do you look up all that shit on Pinterest like pregnancy announcements and gender reveal ideas if you’re not going to actually do one?”
My heart rate picks up. Sometimes I forget that he’s so perceptive. I smirk at him. “Is this your way of admitting that you have always Facebook stalked me?”
“I think the secret has been out for a while now that I’ve always been hyper aware of you, even when we both dated other people. Quit dodging the subject.”
My shoulders fall. “I’m scared.”
“Of what?”
“That I’ll jinx myself. That people will judge us for doing everything so fast and young. We’re good, and for a long time we weren’t. Our parents support us one hundred percent, which is sort of a miracle. I don’t want us to change if people start getting opinionated, which is always the case with social media.”
He stands and steps in front of me, then leans over and places his hands on each armrest of my chair so that we’re face to face. “The only people that can change us, Presley, isus.Stop letting our timeline or the abortion determine how you live your life. We aren’t ashamed of our choice to get married and start a family. We have a lifetime of history. No one was there for the eighteen years that we knew each other and were friends. No one else determined our feelings for each other even when we were too stubborn to tell each other. Did you care what anyone else thought when you let me fuck you for the first time that Christmas? Did you think about what people would say when you didn’t make me wrap it up or pull out? Had I not been a dick when you found out you were pregnant the first time at eighteen would you have been ashamed to tell people?”
I wonder if he’ll ever know how much he’s my rock. He levels me. He’s my voice of reason. “No. The answer to every question is the same.”
“Do you regret getting pregnant now that you are? Have you changed your mind about wanting a baby with me? Do you feel like we made this decision prematurely?”
I frown and place my hand on my baby bump. “Of course not. You know I want this baby. God knows we worked hard for it. I knew I wanted forever and a family with you from the time I was young. I want everything with you. I always have. That’s never going to change. I’m mostly scared that if I get too excited or cocky, we’ll lose it.” My eyes water up a little. “I want our baby. I love you.”
His eyes soften a little. He’s so handsome. “We can’t control everything, Pres. I’d like to think God takes our circumstances into consideration when it comes to our mistakes. You can’t help that I was in a bad place then any more than I can help you making the decision alone. You’re not going to be punished. If this baby is meant to be here it will be. Enjoy the process or it’s going to pass us by and you’re going to have regrets. And while I’m pretty positive there will be others, it won’t be the same.”
I take a deep breath. “You’re right. I promise I’ll try harder to be positive.”
He comes closer and presses his lips to mine. I love that he’s not afraid to show me affection in public. While the small lobby isn’t full, there are a couple of other patients scattered.
“Presley Baker,” a female voice calls out into the lobby. Konnor stands upright and takes my hands to help pull me up. We both walk toward the smiling girl in scrubs that looks to be in her thirties if I had to guess. She pushes the door open farther with her back to let us enter. “How are you?”
“Good,” I answer, following her through the maze to a room where she shuts the door behind us.