Page 5 of Finding Fate
“Yes. Her natural hair color is blonde. That’s why I didn’t recognize her. The way she looks now is more on our level. She comes from money just like you two.”
“Can we fix them?”
“We can try.” I lean in to kiss her. She’s developed an attachment to Maddox since the night in the basement when he saw her insecurity firsthand. Then came Maddox the teddy bear. The one that cares about people—like keeping my mother informed about me. That’s why everyone loves him. He and her have their own weird little relationship. Part of me loves her attachment to my best friend. The other part hates it. The bigger part likes it, though, because no one wants his girl and best friend to hate each other, so I let it go. If I trust the fucker with my life, I’ll trust him with my wife. “I’ll be back.” As I open the door I glance back at Konnor. “Find her.”
I shut the door a little too hard behind me, before making my way down the sidewalk, toward the porch, and climb to the top of the steps to sit beside him. I snatch the bottle out of his hand when he attempts to bring it to his lips and throw it out into the yard as far as it’ll fly. Half of it is already gone. I hope it was something he found already in the cabinet and not a brand-new bottle. His tolerance is built for beer, not hard liquor. “We’re not going back to this shit. Numb and medicated aren’t the ways to live. We’re better than this. You helped me. I’m going to help you. What happened with Gabby?”
He leans over and puts his arms to his knees, placing his forehead to the heels of his hands. “Oh, you know how it goes. I put my heart on the line. Asked her to move to Miami with me. We made love all night. Then I woke up to a cold bed and her phone is turned off. Didn’t even get a goodbye. The girl I gave everything to left in the middle of the night like I was a one-night stand.”
His angry tone breaks and he starts to cry, his shoulders shaking. “Goddammit. She makes me a pussy. My chest is so tight it hurts. I feel all anxious and shit. Makes it hard to breathe. She acted like we were on the same page. Like she wanted this as much as me. We were finally getting a do-over. Do you know what that’s like? To be so addicted to a fucking cunt and have to go without it. Then, when you finally get it back, it walks away.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? She’s knocked up in the truck.”
“Sometimes I wish I had knocked her up. Maybe then her dad would have left us alone. It’s like we’re being punished for the year we were born in.” A humorless laugh slips. “Jesus. I’m losing it. Who wishes for shit like that?” He looks at me, his cheeks flushed red and splotchy, a layer of wetness on top. “What’s wrong with me, Rig? Give it to me straight. I don’t have issues getting in girls’ pants. One blows my phone up from time to time wanting more, but I can’t give anyone else more. Theonegirl I want I literally can’t have, no matter how good I become, or how hard I try. Nothing is ever enough. I feel like I could kill someone right now.”
He looks weird with tears. They don’t really belong on a man his size. Maddox is nothing but solid, hard-earned muscle on an already bigger frame than mine—wide shoulders, thick chest, big arms, back muscles for days, yet we can wear the same size jeans. Watching him climb a tree is impressive.
I sigh, hating this side of him, and it’s been so damn long. It makes him vulnerable. Last time he got like this because of her he went on a girl binge trying to get over her, hoping the next one would be her magical replacement. Fucked everyone attractive that spread her legs. Then the guilt came over it and so did the excessive drinking. “Nothing. You’re everyone’s hero and you know it. Mr. Personality. Most handsome. Life of the party. Weren’t those the dumbass categories you were voted for in the yearbook. You’re loyal and supportive of those you care about. Stop trying to be the golden boy hoping it’ll get her back. If her dad is too ignorant to see that you’re the best man for her then fuck him. At some point, she’ll either stand up to him or you’ll meet someone that makes it all irrelevant.”
He wipes his face on his shoulder, trying to calm down. “She said she hasn’t fucked anyone else. Just hooked up here and there. The face of every girl I’ve been with since her flashed through my mind the second she told me. The guilt was so heavy I could barely breathe. Felt like I’d cheated on her. I snapped at her—pissed her off. I panicked when she started to walk out the door. Six years apart and didn’t let one single guy stick it. Even with unnaturally black hair she’s hot enough to get any guy. Her body is better than when I left it. From every angle that makes her mine, but if that’s the case, then where is she?”
Six years is a long time to go without sex if that’s true, especially when you were having regular, normal sex before, because Maddox doesn’t have a low sex drive. He hasn’t since he hit puberty. He had sex with Gabby gone much more frequently than me with Abby gone. He sure as hell didn’t let her age stand in his way. She said yes and that’s all that mattered. He was only seventeen and eighteen at the time. All teenage boys want to do is shove their dicks into something wet. It makes things a lot more confusing. “I don’t know. It doesn’t make sense. Maybe she needed some space.”
He laughs. “Space. That’s all she’s had.” He glances around, silence lingering in the air. “You know what? Fuck it. Let’s go. I’m ready to go home. There’s nothing here for me anymore. If she wants me she can come looking.”
With that he stands, his bare feet padding down the porch steps. “You can’t board a plan like that.”
“Then find me a shirt and shoes. If I have to look at that bed again after last night I’m looking for more alcohol, and since you threw out Landon’s bottle he left last time he was here before I got good and drunk, you’re going to be the one to babysit my ass during the flight when I find it.”
My mouth tips and I stand, already making my way to open the door. If the little demanding asshole starts coming out, there is hope. The golden boy he pushes to be when he’s thinking too much can go to Hell.Savage Saints—we didn’t just pull that shit out of a hat for nothing. It’s our way of life. A southern creed. Regardless of where we live, we’re country boys through and through. A little bit of bad and a little bit of good. Moderation is key to everything.
Four
Gabby
Istare at my beige bedroom wall from where I’m spread out over my queen size bed on my stomach, the high thread count comforter beneath me wet from my constant crying. Last time I looked out the window it was nightfall, and instantly I thought of Maddox. I wonder what he thought when he woke up and I wasn’t there. If he was upset at all. If he left without me. He probably got angry more than sad, which means he’s likely going to go find some worthless slut to shove his dick into. I should have woken him up. Or left a note. He won’t come looking for me.
More tears fall.
My stomach flips when the exterior lock on my bedroom door sounds. I’ve been waiting for this moment since I woke up locked in my old room. My dad had it installed when he found out about me and Maddox so that he could keep me from sneaking out if need be. My room is upstairs, and despite all those movies you see where it’s as simple as climbing down a damn tree, I have no such luck. It’s a solid drop from my bedroom window. I’m stuck, and in this subdivision a ladder would stick out like a sore thumb. Plus, my dad isn’t that dumb.
The door opens and closes. I can feel his presence before he makes it to my bedside. I’d love to know how he found me. There is a reason I don’t have social media accounts or hang out with people from my past he can get to, to question with his scare tactics. My dad could crack a monk under a vow of silence. I change night jobs every so often so I don’t get too comfortable. During the day I clean houses for cash. I’d rather keep my social security number out of the mix where possible, knowing damn well he knows it and can easily use it for his benefit. I live like a ghost because I want to be one.
I sit up and cross my legs in front of me, ready to face the music. He knows I’m not afraid of him. The only thing I had to lose he took. He’s standing at the side of the bed, legs shoulder width apart and his hands in the pockets of his designer trousers, radiating so much power with his handsome features like his strong jawline, dark hair and eyes and tan skin that shows every bit of his Greek heritage, but even the devil can make himself physically appealing. My blonde hair that he loved so much came from my mother’s side. “Gabrielle, it’s nice to have you home.”
“I’m only home because you kidnapped me.”
“Stop being dramatic. It only makes you sound like your mother.”
My cheeks burn hot. “You drugged me, Dad! Then took me against my will. That’s kidnapping! How did you know where I live?”
“No, I took back lost property. I’ve let you wander around like a homeless person long enough. God knows that house you’re living in looks like a dump. You’re going to come home, clean yourself up, and go to college like you should have already been doing. In case you’re forgetting, I created you, and I’m always one step ahead, like knowing about you spreading your legs for that boy last night. I’m sure you let him use you as a cum bucket too for old time’s sake. I’ve had one whore. I’m not going to have another.”
Fuck.Please be gone.
He nods toward my nightstand where a glass of water and a pill are both sitting I haven’t even noticed. “Take it.”
My body starts to shake. “What is that?”