Page 71 of Fear the Fall
“How so?” I question, not entirely understanding his reasons.
He bites out a harsh laugh. “Victoria, you know as well as I do that our father doesn’t allow his children to experience what he’s gifted to humans. Even when he banished me to Hell, he kept me in metaphorical chains. I could rule and cause intense emotions for others, but I myself couldn’t enjoy those same pleasures. Even pain is better than feeling nothing. I just got to witness others enjoying the perks of Earth.”
Wow, I thought to myself. The great devil, who governs sin and desire, wanted to feel. It was almost poetic justice that the very thing he unleashed on the world was the one thing he himself was deprived of. It was kind of sad in a sense.
“What our dear old dad forgot was that on Earth, his rules for us don’t apply.” A grin spread out over his face. “So I found the loophole and took a holiday.”
“What did you do?”
He smirks. “Do you really want to know the dirty details, love?” he asks, but jumps right in without so much as a second for me to answer. “Drugs, booze, gambling... sex,” he whispers, with a raised brow.
I grimace, my mind conjuring up all kids of scenarios, and he is right, I don’t want any more details. He smiles at my discomfort and I glare in response. Jealousy slithers in uninvited, making my skin crawl and my fists clench and unclench under the table.
“There’s no need for jealousy, love. I never cared for any of them.”
“That’s even worse, Lucifer. Using women isn’t a sport.”
“Every one of them gladly participated and knew their part in our time together,” he explains. “There was so much I hadn’t experienced, and they were eager to show me. I chased every high I could...” He takes a deep breath. “And then I saw you.”
My eyes fall away from him, needing to look anywhere but at his gorgeous green eyes that threaten to pull me under his spell. I don’t want to hear any more. I am about to tell him as much when he continues on.
“I wanted to know you, Victoria. I’d enjoyed so much of the time I’d spent on Earth, but that night—” He smiles to himself. “Those few minutes with you made me feel more than I had felt in all the years I’d spent here.”
The weight of his admission cloaks me like a thick wool garment, threatening to pull me to the ground. I don’t have words. I can hardly think past all the voices in my head, screaming for me to run while I can.
“Can I get you two something to drink?” a woman croons, bringing my eyes up. She doesn’t look my way at all. Her focus is solely on Luke.
He clears his throat, looking down at the menu the woman has placed in front of him.
“Excuse me,” I say, as snarky as possible. “Can I get one of those too?”
“Mmmhmm,” she says unintelligibly, never looking my way but nearly throwing the laminated menu at my chest.
My mouth drops open in righteous outrage. Luke covers his mouth with his own menu, stifling the smile at my reaction to the waitress’s blatant flirting and outright dismissal of me.
“Do you two need a room?” I bark. Luke chokes and the bleach-blonde waitress with the gaudy mauve lipstick fans herself while mustering up an artificial look of mortification.
Luke pulls himself together, sitting taller and clearing his throat. “We’ll take two Cokes and two bacon, egg, and cheese croissants to go, Marcy.”
She beams in his direction, nodding enthusiastically, as though he’d given her some kind of earth-shattering praise. She saunters off, swinging her hips more than is necessary.
I scowl. “Marcy?”
He shrugs. “She was shouting it in her head, like she wanted me to know.”
“Disgusting,” I blurt, pulling a face that says,I might throw up.
I shouldn’t be surprised by Marcy’s reaction. The poor woman can’t help herself. He is the devil, and, in all fairness, he radiates sexuality. If he can affect a fallen angel like he does, surely a poor mortal can’t help herself.
I mentally slap myself for making excuses for the woman. Plenty of people turn their backs on Lucifer. Those that don’t find themselves burning for eternity, and if I don’t pull myself together, I might just meet that same damned fate. I don’t put anything past God at this point.