Page 50 of A Moment Too Late
Sometimes it’s not even a day. One single defining moment can change everything.
It doesn’t do me any good to dwell on the past, on the what-ifs. Nothing will change what happened back then and the past has brought us to this point right now. Standing inside of the park where my best friend was murdered. Where I’ll stand next to the man that was her boyfriend when she died, hold his hand, and listen as her mother shares stories of her only daughter.
As I slide up next to Jay, he wraps his arm around me, kissing the top of my head. He’s still sweaty from the race, the light gray shirt he wore this morning now splattered with dark splotches, clinging to his chest.
He needs another shower, and I will gladly volunteer to wash his back. And every other part of him.
Because in twenty-four hours, I’m going to lose him all over again. He’ll head back to wherever he lives now, and I’ll be on a plane to LA. It’s our last official night together and I plan to make the most out of it. I’m going to ignore the guilt that feels like it’s crushing my soul.
“Anyone want coffee?” Spence asks, appearing in front of us freshly showered.
“Yes, please,” I say, jumping away from Jay as if we were caught sucking face instead of cuddling.
Spence raises an eyebrow at me but doesn’t call me out, instead motioning for me to follow him when both Mia and Jay decline his offer. Not before he shares a knowing look with Mia though. Not before I catch her hint of a smile.
As the crowd thins around us, I notice a few vendors set up near the playground. Large banners cover the front of the tables, extension cords winding through the grass behind them. We’re headed straight for the Java Bean’s table.
“Two mochas, please,” Spence say when it’s our turn to order, handing over cash to one girl as the other starts making our drinks.
The cashier winks at Spencer when she hands him back his change, but he doesn’t appear to notice. He drops a few singles in the tip jar and takes my elbow, leading us to a bench to wait for our order.
“Did Mia talk to you?” he asks once we’re seated.
“You know damn well she did. I think you guys are tag teaming us.”
“We may have a plan.”
“What’s the bet this time?”
“No bet, Beauty Queen. This isn’t about being right or wrong. We’re both on the same side. We want you two to be happy.”
There are many sides to Spencer, but he generally only shows one. He’s the funny guy. The prankster. The one who would bet on anything against anyone, even if the odds were stacked against him. He makes light of all situations and tries not to take life too seriously.
Right now, he’s using an authoritative voice with me. One that makes me feel small beneath his stare. If this is how he is with suspects when interrogating them, I wouldn’t be surprised if he has an impeccable record for confessions.
“I appreciate what you two are trying to do,” I state, standing when they call our order, “but save yourself the trouble. Let’s just enjoy the last day we have together. I’m almost finished with the profile and I’m meeting with the chief tomorrow at noon on my way out of town. You should be there. I want you to hear it. Then, I’m headed back to Cali. Back to the life I’ve built there. I’ll miss you guys. This town will always hold a special place in my heart, but I won’t be coming back.
“It’s too much to take. Too many memories around every corner, and though ninety-nine percent of them are good memories, the end result is still the same. My heart breaks all over again. The day I found out she was killed slaps me across the face and I’m right back to where I started. Mourning the loss of my best friend.”
“But—”
“Spence, I love you. You’re a great friend, and I promise to call more often. You and Mia can come visit me in LA but as far as everything else goes, I’m leaving it all here. I’m moving on. Letting go as best I can. It might not be what I want but it’s what I need.”
Spence only nods as he hands me my mocha, wraps his arm around my shoulder, and guides us back into the crowd in search of the rest of our group. My tribe. The people I’ll always be able to turn to because they’re the only other people who understand what I’ve been through.