Page 37 of Thy Kingdom Come
With a roar, I fist my hair and begin to pace. I need to get out of my head and remember what Nolen is. Not all Catholics are in cahoots with the Doyles, but Nolen is involved in illegal dealings, which means he isn’t a Catholic minding his business.
If I let him live and he is with the Doyles, it’ll be on me. I’ll be seen as the pussy who choked.
“I know ye don’t wanna hear it,” he pants, shifting as he clutches his side. “But yer a good lad. No matter what yer da says. I see yer ma in ya.”
Coming to a sudden stop, I turn my cheek slowly. “What did ya say?”
Nolen doesn’t wipe away the blood I spilled. He lets me see what I’ve done and what I plan to do. “I knew yer ma,” he reveals, leaving me awful shocked. “Cara was so parful. Ya were the love of her life. She’d do anythin’ to protect ya.”
“Yer aul’ arse,” I snarl, barely holding back the urge to cut out his tongue for spewing forth such lies.
But Nolen doesn’t waver. “Believe whatcha want, but it’s true.”
“And why haven’t ya mentioned this until now?” I ask, watching for any signs of deceit. Nolen did lie to us for years about his religion. What’s stopping him from lying right now to save his arse?
But what he does next catches me by surprise.
He laughs loudly.
“You away in the head?” My question just has him laughing harder.
Blood mixes with tears as he confesses, “For years, I’ve kept this secret, but no more. Yer not an eejit, lad, even though yer da treats ya like one.”
“What secret?” I ask between clenched teeth.
When Nolen just continues to laugh, appearing to have lost the plot, I angrily spring forward and slap his cheek. “Yer a fierce cunt, so ya are. I’m about to slit yer throat and yer laughin’. What’s the matter with ya?”
His laughter is soon replaced with nothing but tears. “Get a move on then!” he shouts, but we’re not done until he explains himself.
“Answer my question!” I demand, yanking him forward so we’re pressed nose to nose.
“I tell ye and then what?” Nolen has realized that he just may have an advantage that could save his life.
Shoving him back into the chair, I stand tall. “That depends on what ya tell me,” I warn because he isn’t in control. I am.
“I’ll tell ye what it is, but yer to promise to let me go.”
“Will I, yea?” I state, because that’s something I can’t do. But a small bothersome voice reasons that this is a compromise I’m willing to make.
If he has information which could prove to be useful to me, then I have to agree. I could just kill him afterward, but I don’t work that way. If I give him my word, then I plan on sticking to it. And I would have saved Orla the heartache of not knowing what happened to her da.
A voice I’ve not heard in so long tackles me from out of nowhere.“I’m so proud of ya, my wee son.”
Ma?
It can’t be. It must be wishful thinking, or my mind playing tricks because if my ma were to speak to me, those aren’t the words she’d say. I’ve hurt more people than I’ve loved, which is nothing to be proud of. But I can’t help it. This is who I am. I don’t know how else to be.
“All right then,” I utter, watching as a wave of relief washes over Nolen. “I give ya my word. But if yer lyin’ to me, I promise ya…ya won’t like the consequences.”
Nolen nods eagerly, understanding the seriousness of my words.
“Thank ye, Puck,” he wheezes, adjusting his position to get comfortable. “I’m sorry I lied to ya. But I had to protect my family.”
“Enough,” I snap, not interested in having a deep and meaningful conversation. “Start talkin’.”
Nolen takes three deep breaths, wiping away the blood from his broken nose. “Yer whole life, he’s been lyin’ to ya.”
“Who has?” I fold my arms across my chest, watching Nolen closely. “And lyin’ about what?”