Page 35 of Hard Deal
“We’re not going to finish this?” she asked.
Even though the orgasm was great, she had a distinct feeling of being cheated. Her sex still pulsed and throbbed, desperate to be filled. But Caleb was going to leave her hanging.
“If you want it Friday night, I’m all yours.” He planted a kiss on her lips and she caught a brief taste of something unfamiliar and earthy. Her. “Until then...looks like I’ve ruined two of these now.”
He gestured at the two pairs of underwear sitting on her desk. Neither one was wearable.
“See you on Friday.” He sauntered toward the door and let himself out as she scrambled off her desk, pulling her skirt down and wondering how the hell she was going to be able to concentrate on work for the rest of the day.
You’ve got to put a stop to this. He’s running rings around you already. You’ll get chewed up and spat out.
The plan had been to approach the dating scene carefully. Regain her confidence. Start paving the road to feeling sexy and attractive again. Her ex-husband had left scars so deep that whenever she looked in the mirror all she could see was a flashing neon sign that said Not Good Enough. If she’d been prettier/funnier/smarter she could have kept her husband from straying.
Imogen knew thinking like that was a slippery slope to despair. His inability to stay faithful wasn’t anything to do with her, in the end. He was addicted to the attention, to the thrill of the chase. But finding out that he’d never had any intention of being monogamous had cut deep.
Reentering the dating scene only to be met with a whole lot of reinforcing messages that she still wasn’t pretty/funny/smart enough had unpicked that wound stitch by stitch.
That was why she was intoxicated by Caleb’s attention. He gave her what she needed, what she craved—that feeling of being beautiful and attractive and wanted. Of being enough.
It wasn’t because she thought they had a future together...was it?
No. Caleb would grow bored of her like he had with the other women he’d dated. She was a challenge for him, since she’d rebuffed his advances. He, like her ex, enjoyed the chase. So now that he’d caught her it would be over soon. And the quicker she got that into her head, the better.
After she got the information about Daniel on Friday night, she would go back to looking for a nice, safe, sensible man who wouldn’t use and discard her.
* * *
Unfortunately, the glorious pride at bringing Imogen to her knees—or in this case, her back—in the middle of the workday had worn off the second Caleb left her office. The dark cloud hanging over him thickened as the week progressed, causing him to crack with frustration and resentment at any mention of his father. The kind words, while well-meaning, fuelled the fire in his heart.
He’d been avoiding his family like the plague, knowing full well that if they tried to talk to him he was liable to blow a fuse. His mother and Jason had made contact. Gerald, as usual, had stayed silent.
But Caleb had a promise to keep, and that meant having drinks with his brother and Daniel after work on Friday. And, given Imogen was the only person he wanted to see right now, he wasn’t about to break that promise.
“Hey.” Jason looked up from packing a bunch of files into his satchel as Caleb walked into his office. “I had a feeling you were going to cancel on me tonight.”
“Why, because our father decided to tell his employees and his son that he had cancer at the same time? Was that supposed to upset me?” He ladled the sarcasm on thickly. “Nice try, old man, but I guess he forgot I’m immune to giving a shit.”
“I know you don’t mean that.” Jason sighed. “Look, this situation is royally fucked up. I get it. But what am I supposed to do? Neither one of you is willing to give an inch, and I’m not a miracle worker.”
Caleb swallowed back the resentment burning a hole inside him. “Maybe you could have given me the heads-up so I wasn’t blindsided.”
“It wasn’t my news to share. At first he told me he wasn’t going to tell anyone.” Jason raked a hand through his hair. “He wanted to announce my new role and be done with it, but I told him the staff would ask questions if it happened suddenly. We don’t want the company suffering from a lack of confidence because of his secret-keeping.”
“It’s always about the company, isn’t it?” he said bitterly.
“It’ll be different when I’m in charge.”
“Thank God. Big brother to the rescue again.” He held up his hand when Jason went to retort. “Just tell me, did he go to you first or did he go to Mum?”
His brother eyed him warily. “Why does that matter?”
“Because I can take it when he treats me like shit, but she can’t.” He’d seen his mother cry too many times over the way Gerald held her at an arm’s length, even after all these years. The sad thing was, she genuinely loved him. It was the reason she never argued or stood up for herself. “I know she’s not your mother, so you don’t have to care. But she’s his wife. That should mean something.”
“Let’s cut that bullshit out right now. I do care about her. You know that. More importantly, she knows that.” He cleared his throat. “But yes, he came to me first. It was only so we could work out how I was going to transition into the role quickly enough for him to start chemo.”
Chemo. As much as he hated himself for feeling anything at all, the word was a sucker punch. It was easy to be angry at Gerald in principle, because he had every right to be goddamn furious at the old man, but cancer was serious. Cancer that required timelines for chemo was...next level.
It would be easier if Caleb could hate him. But he didn’t.