Page 48 of Hard Deal
“No... I don’t know.” She pressed her fingers to her temple. “I don’t know what I’m doing anymore.”
“For the record, the woman’s name is Emily. She’s a jeweller and a friend of Daniel’s. He commissioned her to design a wedding band for your sister. They’ve been meeting in secret for months because he wanted to be involved in the whole process, but he didn’t want Penny to find out.”
“Oh.”
That wasn’t what she’d expected. And the more she thought about it, the more she was sure it’d been the same women from that night she’d first grown suspicious of Daniel.
“So, you’ve concocted the whole plan to catch him in the act and all because he wanted to do something nice for your sister. You snuck into a ball for chrissake.” He held up a hand. “Now, that’s not to deny that I’m pretty fucking impressed you did that—because I am—but what the hell was it all built on? Just because your husband cheated on you does not mean that every man is out to get some on the side.”
“I never said that.” Tears pricked the backs of her eyes—shame and embarrassment and humiliation trickling through her like poison. She’d let Caleb get too close, get under her skin. He was starting to see the ugly truth beneath her carefully polished veneer and she didn’t like it one bit.
“You sure as hell acted like it.” He raked a hand through his hair. “Imogen, I get it. You were hurt in a brutal way. But Daniel isn’t your ex. I’m not your ex. You need to move on.”
“I have.”
“No, you haven’t. You’re clinging to this bad thing that happened like it’s your life raft, but it’s really a weight around your feet and it’s going to drag you to the bottom of the ocean.” He sighed. “How long has it been? You need to live your life and let your sister live hers.”
“Don’t tell me what to do.” She turned away from him—the bright light streaming in through the floor-to-ceiling windows almost blinding her. He was right, but how could she move on when she still woke up in a sweat after having nightmares of the shame? Of the humiliation?
How could she trust someone like him, who had a reputation like he did, to be the one to help her get past it all? She needed someone safe, someone boring who didn’t push her or challenge her. Not this man who turned her world upside down and threatened everything she thought she knew about herself.
She liked Caleb, a lot. But she wasn’t ready to be shoved to one side like Grace or Neila. She wasn’t ready to be on the receiving end of a “you’re dumped” message or that cold, polite “what do you need?” when she passed him in the hallway at work.
“I don’t want to tell you what to do.” His hand landed soft and reassuring on her shoulder. “But I meant what I said last night. I like you.”
“For now?” She turned, blinking back the tears because she couldn’t shame herself further by crying. “But what happens when you get bored, when you move on to someone else?”
“What if I don’t?”
God, she wanted to believe it so freaking bad.
“You have done with all these women.” What on earth made her any different? “I can’t take that risk. I need someone...safe.”
“It’s a shame you think so little of me, because I really do think you’re pretty damn amazing.” He took a step back, his head bobbing. “But right now, I think you should go.”
She nodded and walked into his bedroom, this time unable to blink the tears away. They fell hot and fast onto her cheeks as she stumbled around his room looking for her clothes, trying to ignore the rumpled bed and overturned lamp that stood as evidence of what had fizzled out as quickly as it started.
By the time she walked back into his living room, Caleb was standing on the balcony, coffee in hand. The rest of their untouched breakfast sat cold on his kitchen table. She left without a word.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
IF CALEB HAD a raincloud above his head the previous week, now it was a typhoon. His anger had morphed into something larger than himself and he carried it like a noose around his neck. The worst thing of all, however, was that he could only blame himself.
After trying every trick in the book to get a positive word or a pat on the head from his father—to get some semblance of love or legitimacy—and failing, he’d thrown all his energy into covering up how he felt by putting on a mask every day until he’d lost himself in the process.
And the mask had become his reality.
The weekend’s events had given him a new perspective, however. Having Imogen confirm his fears that he’d always be burdened by his persona was something he needed to hear. And, in a strange turn of events, Daniel’s wisdom over beers had been the glass-shattering moment he’d been waiting for.
You can choose your friends but you can’t choose your family.
It was simple, really. But he’d spent so long thinking his family and his work were one and the same when they could easily be separated. It was clear he’d never get what he wanted working in the family business—Jase would always be number one, and Caleb would always resent it. Eventually it would ruin their relationship, too. And he didn’t want that.
But he did have the power to change his circumstances.
While Gerald Allbrook might not think much of his son’s skills, Caleb had a degree and years of experience. And, despite failing hard with the one relationship he’d truly wanted in life, he was talented at building relationships with other people. Which meant the calls he’d made this past week were already starting to pay off.
Caleb waited until the office was mostly cleared out, and then he made the long walk down to the big corner office. Mary waved him through and Gerald barely glanced up when she announced his son had come for an impromptu chat—something that never happened.