Page 16 of Filthy Rock Stars
He laughs. “Fun? More like terrifying. This does not fit into my five, ten, or twenty-year plan. Plus, I’m going to have put myself out there in a way that I never do. Absolutely never.”
“Sounds like you’ve decided to do it, though.” I push my foot up his leg, earning a soft gasp. “See? You are mysterious and exciting.”
“And very unaccustomed to men flirting with me like this.” He purses his lips, then smiles again. “I guess if you feel like you’re trapped, the prospect of flipping your life upside down would be appealing.”
It disarms me to have him reference the secret I shared. I’m still not sure why I chose to tell him something so personal, except that it felt fair at the time.
“It would tempt me. Your life must be nice, if you dread the idea.”
“I’ve managed to get things the way I like them. A career I like. Hobbies I like. An apartment and schedule that work for me. Why would I throw that out the window for something unknown?” He shakes his head. “Sorry. I promised myself I wouldn’t ramble about this.”
“Ramble away. I like listening to your voice.”
He takes another sip from his beer and declines to share more. “What about you? How was your week?”
“Fine. Work was the same as always. My, uh, bosses annoy me.” Fuck, I hate that I just called Elle and Adrian my bosses. “But it’s fine. I had something to distract me. I just closed my eyes and pictured you against that tree, and everything was right with the world again.”
Prince surprises me by pushing his foot back against mine, sneaker on boot. “Did the other guys in your jewel heist give you a hard time about acting so distracted?”
I laugh. “When I told them I’d met a sexy zookeeper? No, they understood.” I swallow the beer, then indulge in sharing more with him, stuff I don’t normally talk about with anyone. “Truthfully, I’m not fully out at work.”
“Oh,” he says, surprised. “I mean, I know that can be complicated. You’re just so bold—I didn’t assume you were closeted.”
“The few people I work with closely know,” I tell him, thinking of the band. “They’re careful with my privacy. But I don’t typically gossip about my sex life with them, or with anyone.”
“Is being semi-closeted difficult?”
I shake my head. “It’s a choice. I like to stay out all night and party, but I appreciate my privacy, too. Plus, there are a bunch of assholes in my family and my industry. I don’t want to hear their shit.”
“It sounds hard.”
The softness in his voice catches me. “It’s really not,” I say again, aware that I’m complaining, which I hate. Nothing worse than a whiny rock star.
I tangle our legs and lean back, eager to distract from the funny knot in my belly. Everyone back home is obsessed with Forbidden Destiny, my family especially, but I’m no fool. I know they wouldn’t all support me if I came out as gay. It’s better for all involved if I keep things easy, but my closeted life is definitely not what I want to be thinking about right now.
Hell, I never talk about this. With anyone.
Prince nods slightly, not pushing me to say more, then smiles. “You really thought about me all week?”
“I imagined you were thinking about me, too. That was your kink we were enjoying.” I lean forward. “Or did I mess it up? You needed more furtive glances? More dirty whispers?”
He laughs and pushes his foot up my leg. “You were perfect. And yeah. I was thinking about you.”
I hum under my breath. “Good.”
We’re back on familiar ground now, dirty flirtations and lust. I eye him until he starts to quiver.
“You know what I keep thinking about?” I ask, lowering my voice.
“What’s that?”
“One minute, you were so sweet and shy. But the second I got my hand on your cock, your inhibitions evaporated. You were horny and raw and fucking hot.”
He laughs. “I felt like a different person.”
“I like that they’re both you. A little reserved on the outside, but kinky and bold when I peel the layers back.” My cock swells as I remember it.
Prince swallows. “Thank you,” he says gently. “You’ve done something like this before? Anonymous?”