Page 88 of Lilacs and Leather
“Good call. Not much to see anyway, especially when we’ve got our own eye candy,” Lucas teases, waggling his eyebrows at me suggestively.
I chuckle, smiling despite myself. Lucas always has had that effect on me, lightening my mood even when I’d rather wallow. Lydia turns to face me more fully, resting her hand on my chest and playing with the buttons of my shirt. I purr a little, a shiver running up my spine. Her touch works miracles. Lucas moves off to handle a drink order, and I close my eyes. My thoughts swirl restlessly, distracting me from Lydia. She hums a little, but it lacks the resonance of a purr.
“You never purr for us,” I whisper off-handedly.
Lydia’s hand stills and I open my eyes to find her face pulled into a distant, troubled expression. I’ve hit a nerve and I open my mouth to apologize, but she starts speaking before I can.
“My parents… the church, really, told us that an omega’s purr is sacred, a gift from God meant only for their mate. But I never heard one growing up. My mom never purred for my dad, at least not that I heard. I don’t even know how,” Lydia whispers, words barely carrying over the ambient noise of the restaurant.
I frown, heart sinking. An omega has instincts to soothe those around them, and their purr is the perfect tool to do so. An alpha purr works wonders on their omega, but it’s fairly limited in its efficacy compared to an alpha bark, and barely affects betas at all. Betas have a pheromone that they can use to calm alphas or omegas, but it takes a while for it to work to full potency. An omega’s purr can stop an alpha rage in its tracks, or at least that’s what the rumors say. Seth withheld his purr, preferring to be comforted than do the comforting. That Lydia was never taught how to do it, when she clearly wants to, makes my heart twist.
“I can try to teach you, if you want,” I offer, picking my words hesitantly.
Lydia looks up into my face, eyes wide and eyebrows raised. I keep my expression neutral, trying not to show how much I want her to learn. She bites her lower lip, and I wrap my arms around her waist, holding her against me loosely.
“If you want. I can’t promise I’ll get it right away,” Lydia hedges, looking around.
I do the same, and exhale as I see that we’re still pretty much alone at this end of the bar, even as the restaurant fills almost to capacity. I set my shoulders and smile at Lydia, gentle and encouraging. I put one hand flat against her sternum, trying to keep my touch as innocent as possible. Lydia still cocks an eyebrow at me, smirking.
“It’s like humming, but it comes from here,” I say, pressing slightly.
I put her hand on my chest, mirroring the position of my hand. I let out a little purr, and her eyes brighten as she feels the vibrations through her palm. Her brow furrows in concentration, and she starts to hum. I can hear the sound shifting as she tries to swallow it, pushing it from her lips to the back of her throat. I shiver as I feel the rumbling in her chest for a moment before she runs out of breath.
“You almost had it. Just let your instinct take over,” I encourage, a little breathless.
“It’s hard when your scent is so happy,” Lydia says with a sharp exhale through her nose.
I swallow, nodding. I search my memory, thinking about Seth. I usually lock all of those feelings in a neat box in the back of my mind, but it’s easier to open now that he’s charged back into my life.
“I think the worst part of this whole situation is not having a choice. Growing up, I was expected to find a nice girl, an omega preferably, and settle down. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer, but I was too good at sales to ever enjoy it. I never felt like I had a choice of who I was going to end up with, and that’s all I’ve ever wanted. Seth took that from us, from me. And now…”
I trail off, emotion clogging my throat. The words are right there, on the tip of my tongue, but I can’t finish. Before Lydia, I never cared if I would ever get out of this bond. I wanted companionship, but I knew that every time I got close to someone, I’d have to break their heart and my own when we could never be more than temporary. It didn’t stop me from trying, but I could only put myself through that so many times before it became too much.
But meeting Lydia has been world changing. What I feel for her is so new, so unlike I’ve ever felt before. She makes me want to be better, to do better for her. When I see her, it’s like looking at the face of an angel sent down from heaven for me to love and cherish. She’s the last person I think about before I fall asleep at night, and the first person I think of when I wake up. Even when Seth had his claws sunk deep into me and I couldn’t tell up from down, it wasn’t like being with Lydia. I would do anything to make her smile, to hear laugh.
She has so much room in her heart, so much love to give that it feels right to let her share that with as many of my packmates as she pleases. I know she cares for me; I can see it in the way the green of her eyes brightens when she teases me, or when she looks at me like she can’t believe I’m real. But it’s me who gets blown away by this marvelous, kind, funny, sweet soul that fits perfectly in my arms. I want everything with her, to show her every little secret I’ve discovered in every city I’ve ever been to. I want her to show me all of the places that are special to her that I’ve never seen. I want to find adventure with her, in all its forms.
My shoulders relax as I inhale a strong lungful of lilacs and vanilla, the hand on her breastbone vibrating softly. I close my eyes and let my head fall back, smiling serenely as my troubles fall away, my mind and body full of Lydia’s delicate little kitten purr. It doesn’t last long, maybe a few seconds before she loses it, but I almost feel weightless as it fades. It’s like a post-workout high mixed with the aftershocks of a mind-blowing orgasm.
“Oh, wow. Baby, that’s…wow,” I breathe, swallowing as my mouth goes dry suddenly.
“Was that too much? Your scent was so sad, and I—”
“No, that’s incredible. Next time Rhett gets in one of his moods, you have to try this on him. It’s going to blow his mind,” I say with a little laugh.
I open my eyes and look down at her, smiling at the look of joy shining up at me. I gather her close, pressing a soft, chaste kiss to her lips before settling my cheek on the top of her head. She’s so good, and knowing that I make her happy settles something in my chest. I feel a kernel of warmth next to my heart, glowing bright and hot. I don’t dare put a name to the feeling, but I can’t deny how right the world feels when she’s in my arms.
I feel my phone vibrate against my thigh, and I’m tempted to just ignore it. But even if I desperately want to ignore everything except the woman in my arms, I can’t. Not with the Sword of Seth Douglas hanging over our heads. I keep Lydia close as I pull my phone from my pocket, opening Rhett’s newest message.
Rhett: He’s so fucking insufferable. This meeting should have been over a dozen times, but he keeps trying to make demands. Like he’s in any position to ask us for shit.
Me: Remember when I suggested we just hire a hitman to take care of him, but ~someone~ said that’s not how we handle our problems?
Rhett: I said what I said. I want the pleasure of killing him myself.
“Is that Rhett? Is everything okay?” Lydia asks, words tight with concern.
I nod, putting my phone back without typing a response. “Seth has always gotten under Rhett’s skin, and it’s only gotten worse since the bonding fiasco. You know how he is about consent.” I sigh.