Page 43 of His to Keep
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When the snoweventually melts a few weeks later, Father Aaron tells Callum that he can finally take me outside. At first, I think maybe he feels guilt for touching me in the library, and it’s the only reason he’s letting me out. Then I scoff at myself, at my stupid naivety, knowing Father Aaron isn’t anything other than a soulless creature with zero remorse or humanity.
Time. So much has changed in what feels like so little. Like it was only yesterday that I got into Father Aaron’s car and was taken here. And now look at me. Dressed up like a doll that he’s probably watching from the window. A smirk beaming on his face, knowing there’s no nook or cranny I can try and escape through. I guess suffering has made the days blend together. Days pass by and wait for no one to catch up. I know I haven’t—I’m still grappling to hold on.
Leading the way, Callum takes me downstairs. The front door’s already open, a crisp breeze blowing inside and cleansing the air of its mustiness. It’s not warm, but it’s not freezing either as I step over the threshold, welcoming the sunshine on my pale face. I’m almost dizzy from fresh air as I follow Callum to the back of the house where the trees are thicker. That’s when I spy that we’re heading toward a trail leading into the woods. Although knowing we can’t get further than the fence, I’m glad to be outside. Maybe it’s falling into line, but Callum and I deserve a respite from misery.
“I actually dreamed of the woods last night,” I find myself saying openly as we walk along the trail with trees on either side. “You were in it.”
“Me?” Callum walks ahead, and I can’t help rolling my eyes, wishing he’d stop sounding surprised that he’s in my head and someone I constantly dream about.
“Yes. You were there next to me, and then suddenly you weren’t, and I was lost. Trying to find someone who doesn’t want to be found. I guess it turned into a bit of a nightmare.”
He turns to me then and stops. “Ah, but what if it was because I was trying to find you first?” My chest deflates, and I bow my head. “Look at me,” he demands, and when I meet his eyes, he’s facing me.Gloweringat me. Enough to send a rush of shivers down my back. “I want you. I have since the moment I laid eyes on you…”
I swallow hard. “But?”
“But Ican’t.” My mood darkens at his words.
“Fine!” Going off the trail, I bat branches away from my face as I weave between trees. Going nowhere but somewhere.Anywhere.
“Ava,” Callum calls from somewhere behind me, but I ignore him, just needing to get away from him even though I hear him following. The terrain is uneven here, and my feet sink into moss as I march away. A rock hidden beneath the green marsh catches my foot, and I brace myself to fall. A hand grabs me around the waist, stopping me from falling.
“Ava, stop.” Twirling in his arms, I push him back. Stumbling, he grabs a thin tree just in time to avoid falling. At first, he looks bewildered until his eyebrows drop, and he glares at me. “What is your problem?”
“Youare my problem. You want me, and then you don’t. It’s confusing. You’re being nice one minute and then not. I know I shouldn’t want you either. I should hate you, and right now, maybe I do!”
Turning away from him, I go deeper into the woods. Thinking he might just ditch me, I’m surprised when I hear him following again. Though, he doesn’t try to grab me again, even when I trip over a branch I don’t see and fall on my hands and knees. Huffing out in frustration, I get up and continue.
“You’re going to hurt yourself,” he says behind me.
“Likeyoucare.”
He grabs me then, turning me around so fast I slam into his chest. “I care! I care more than I should. But we’ve been stupid gambling with your life, and you know it.”
“Or maybe you’re justweak.” Eyes flaring, he suddenly grabs me around the throat. His grip is tight but not painful, and I smirk up at him spitefully, knowing exactly what I just did. Poked the flames I know simmer inside of him. I want to push him. Get an emotional reaction from him. Somethingreal. Even though this isn’t me.
“Weak?” he repeats and then laughs coldly, pushing me back. Gasping, I’m suddenly on the ground, and he’s there, on top of me. I smack his shoulders, but he grabs my wrists and pins them into the dirt above my head. “Tell me how I’m weak. Go ahead.”
“Yo—you never take what you want. Never go against your father. Why? Why won’t you take me?” I almost yell at him, hurt by his torment of wanting me and then not. We glare at each other, both our breathing heavy.
Suddenly, his mouth slams against mine, and he kisses the life right out of my soul. I’m so shocked. All I can do is lie there as he moans into my mouth, tongue pushing past my teeth to touch mine. I shiver all over, especially when he pulls away and says, “I’ve wanted to do that for weeks.”
Running my hands through his hair, I tug him forward, and our lips meet again. This time I’m the one groaning, his scent and taste intoxicating me. Gripping my thighs, he pulls them apart, pressing closer into me. I shudder. He’s hard as he leans into me more, face twisted with pleasure and anger and need.
“You like this? You like me kissing and touching you like this?” Frantically, I nod, and his hand goes back around my throat. This time a tiny bit tighter, his fingers applying pressure against my windpipe. “Then I thinkyouare the one who is weak.”
My breath shudders as he rocks into me again. Whining, it seems my body wants to do its own thing as I lift my hips to meet him, my eyes rolling back when it only intensifies the sensation. “I…I am. I’m weak for you.”
He nips at my chin before pulling himself up to kneel in front of me. Flushing at my legs spread before him, the skirt of my dress now at my hips, the way he’s staring down at me makes my heart thump so hard you can physically see it. And he does, his eyes like fire on water.
Breathing out heavily through his nose, he tears his gaze off me to quickly look around the woods. Satisfied that we’re not being watched, his fingers hook the sides of my panties, and he takes them off. Cool air licks the burning flesh between my legs. Trees sway above us, and I’m there with them, swishing high above, almost touching the clouds.
Dropping his hand, he touches my sex. I inhale sharply as his lips part at how wet I am. Licking his lips, he looks into my eyes. “I’ve been dying to taste you.”
My lower belly coils, remembering how he used his mouth in the shower. “Taste w-where?”
The corner of his lip lifts as he cups me down there. “Here.”