Page 12 of Courting Claudia
And that epitomized the very thing she liked the least about Richard. He cared too much for what her father thought. She’d spent her entire life fretting about her father’s perception of her and fantasizing about marrying a man who would free her from that.
Richard would never be that man. But he was all life had offered her. Women like her didn’t get to pick any man they wanted. They married the first man who asked, because chances were he’d be the only one to do so.
If her father got the deciding vote about where she would have to spend her remaining days, he would most definitely put her in the country. After all, how much trouble could she get into out there? She wouldn’t be close enough to embarrass him in front of his friends in Parliament. Marrying Richard would ensure she had to quit her job at the paper.
Richard was a kind man, and he wanted her for his wife, but it wasn’t the life full of love she’d dreamed of. It was the life she would learn to love.
Chapter 3
Claudia peeked out from her bedcovers. Never had she lain in bed all morning, but today she was desperate. “Is he still looking for me, Baubie?” She eyed her maid, who stood across the room hanging up dresses.
“Not at the moment, but he’ll be looking for you again directly. You cannot hide from him all day.”
“I know.” She flipped to lie on her stomach with her head propped at the foot of the bed. “But he’s going to want to discuss all the details of last night’s ball, and I’m not sure I want him to know all the details.”
Baubie’s eyebrows shot up, and she leaned against the armoire. “Do you have a secret, dearie?”
Not precisely a secret, but right then it certainly felt like one. Like when she was a child and her mother would buy her a trinket, and together they would hide it from her father so he would not get angry. It had been their little secret.
But this was different. This was not an issue, not anything that should even occupy a thought. Yet the dance with Derrick Middleton had consumed her thoughts since she had left his arms. She caught herself before she sighed.
Baubie cleared her throat.
“It’s nothing. Really.” She tugged at an errant thread on the quilt. “I danced with a gentleman last night, and I’m not certain that Father would approve of him. I know Father wouldn’t approve of him. He despises him, in fact. Thinks he’s the worst sort of man.”
Her maid crossed her arms over her abundant bosom. “How daring of you,” Baubie said. Then concern crossed her face, and she took a step forward. “Is he the worst sort of man? You don’t want to go and get yourself into trouble.”
“He was very gentlemanly with me, and Poppy as well. Polite and not at all discourteous.”
“He doesn’t sound too bad then. Was he handsome?” Baubie asked in a casual tone.
Claudia rolled over onto her back. “He’s undeniably the most handsome man in London.” She tilted her head and met Baubie’s gaze. “I’m relatively certain every woman at the ball would have agreed with me.”
Baubie’s smile widened. “Is that so?”
“Before you fancy something more, it was not a regular dance. We danced only to discuss something important.” She sat up, moving into a cross-legged position. “Business, nothing personal.”
“I just asked a question, dearie.”
“It was a dance, nothing more. Still, Father would not be pleased, and I’d rather not have that conversation with him. But he will ask as he always does after I’ve attended a party. He’ll want to know who attended and what was said.” She frowned. “I don’t even think he’s interested in what I say, as he always probes for more, then decides to ask someone else. But he’ll inquire about the evening nonetheless.”
“Well, I told him earlier that you were still asleep.” Baubie busied herself with the clothes again. “He said you, like all women, were content to laze about their beds all day.”
Claudia snorted. “Wouldn’t he be surprised to know that I wake before he does practically every morning? Of course, if he did know that, I would have to eat breakfast with him, and I’m not positive I’m prepared to do that.” Guilt gnawed at her stomach. She shouldn’t say such things about her father. He had raised her on his own after her mother died. And while he might not be overt with his affection, surely he loved her. He was her father.
Claudia shook her head. “Listen to me. I don’t mean to go on and on about him; you know he’s not a dreadful man. He’s simply strict, and he wants me to honor our family name. I just tire of hearing how I never manage to do that.”
“Listen here, dearie,” Baubie pointed a knobby finger at her mistress. “Never you mind about what you say about your father in front of me. I saw how that man treated your lovely mother, and how he treats you is no different. There is nothing dishonorable about you. He’s the dishonorable one, and if it weren’t for the fact that he pays my wages, I’d tell him that myself.”
Claudia smiled. “No you wouldn’t. You’re too kind. But I appreciate the gesture.”
Baubie hung all her dresses according to their color. It was the first time Claudia had noticed how many pink dresses she owned. Various shades of pink—coral, orchid, rose, blush—too much pink. She frowned; she wasn’t even sure she liked that color. If only she could wear something bold like red or a deep violet.
“What are you going to tell him? About last night, I mean.”
“I don’t know. I’d rather not lie to him. Perhaps I’ll simply withhold some of the details. That’s not the same thing as lying. Is it?”
“Not in my eyes. I think you do what you have to do to make yourself happy. That’s what your mother would have wanted for you.” Baubie brought her hand to her breast. “Bless her soul, that woman adored you. It was as if she didn’t start breathing until the day you were born. You made all the darkness in her life brighter.” She leaned in and kissed Claudia’s forehead, then held her face. “You look just like her, you know. Simply beautiful.”