Page 50 of For Your Eyes Only
If Trip won’t speak to me, I only want to hide under the covers and cry.
“It wasn’t your fault.” She leans forward to kiss my cheek.
I only wish I could believe that.
I’m so pitiful, I can’t help myself. Falling asleep, I send one last text,Please talk to me.
* * *
“Something's different about you,Mariposa.”Michele wraps an arm around my shoulders, as we walk from his apartment to the café. “You look like a woman with secrets.”
“What happens when the caterpillar isn’t completely honest and gets all tangled up in the cocoon, and it ruins everything?”
“I’ve never heard of that happening.”
“It happened to me.”
He slides his hand down my arm, lacing our fingers as he drags me into the small coffee shop. “You’re alive and well, so there’s still hope, yes?”
“I don’t know.”
He leaves me to order us two coffees, and I step to the side. After a long night of waking myself every few hours to check my phone, I finally got up and called my ex-fiancé. After dancing together for five years and being engaged for one, I figure he’s the closest friend I have besides Bianca. He’s also a male, so even if he’s on the other team, I hope he can give me some perspective on what I’ve done—and how to fix it.
“Americano, Americano, Americano,” he croons, placing the white cup in my hand.
“Thank you.” I lift the cup to my lips and sip, allowing the warm caffeine to soothe my soul.
“Now tell me what happened.” We’re walking along the boulevard through the center of the shopping district.
Sky-high palm trees line the street, their skinny trunks reaching to the sky, and I blurt it. “I’m not a virgin anymore.”
His eyebrows shoot to his hairline. “You had sex? With who?” Then his brow immediately furrows. “Was he a gentleman? I’m a bit protective of who my girl sleeps with.”
“I’m not your girl.” I push his shoulder.
“You’re the only girl I’ve ever almost married. Now tell me what happened. Did he hurt you?”
“Mm…” I take another sip, thinking. “I didn’t actually do the penetration part.”
“Gia.” Dark eyes narrow at me. “If there was no penetration, you’re still a virgin.”
“That’s a very male thing to say. You wouldn’t call two lesbians in a relationship virgins, would you?” He frowns, and I continue. “I read a book that said we should find a new definition for virginity, and it should be based on your firstfulfillingsexual experience, but I don’t know if that’s going to catch on.”
“Giana Rossi.” Michele stops walking. “Did you take a dick or not?”
“Oh my God, shut up!” I grab his arm, pulling him away from the early-morning crowd now watching us curiously.
An old woman wrinkles her nose at us, and he blows her a kiss. “Good morning, Mamma.”
I drag him farther down to a somewhat secluded park bench. “Here. Sit. I need your help.”
“It sounds like you do, claiming you’re not a virgin when your hymen is right where it’s always been.”
Exhaling, my shoulders drop, and I look at my cup. “I met this amazing man. He’s handsome and rich and elegant, and he actually wanted to be with me.” Blinking up at him, I point to my chest. “With me.”
“Why does this surprise you? You’re a beautiful woman. I would have been honored to be your husband in Amalfi.”
“We’re not talking about that. I would have lived a long, sexually frustrated life.”