Page 37 of Moonflower
I sigh. I can’t stop worrying that she’s wrong. What if I get worse instead of better? What if I end up dragging her and Wilder down with me? There’s a chance she’d be better off with just him and not me.
That’s not what any of us want, though. And I already know how pissed Wilder will get if I bring it up again. So I nod and kiss Cora on the forehead. “Okay.”
“I vote you call your doctor on Monday to make an appointment,” Wilder says.
Cora glances up at me questioningly. It’s just like her to not want to push me to the point of discomfort. Wilder, on the other hand, has seen me every day. He tries to hide how worried he is, but it bleeds through when he thinks I’m not paying attention. So it makes sense that he wants me to do something ASAP.
“I don’t have to call,” I reply. “I can just book an appointment online.”
“Do you . . . want to?” Cora asks.
“I don’t want anything.” Fuck. “Except you.”
“But are you okay with it? Talking to your doctor about getting on meds?”
“I’m not against it.” And maybe it’ll help me feel human again.
“Then we’re scheduling it right now,” Wilder says. “Get your laptop out.”
I don’t protest, grabbing it from my bag in Cora’s room. Let’s face it—I should’ve done this months ago. And if someone doesn’t force me to schedule the appointment, I’ll probably put it off for months. I’m not proud of that, but it’s the damn truth.
Cora and Wilder sit on either side of me as I schedule the appointment. The next available time is a couple weeks away, and it fits around my class schedule, so I choose that one.
Once I’m done, Cora releases a long breath. Then she takes my hands in hers. “It took me months to do anything about my depression when I moved away. I know how hard it is, Ez. So I’m proud of you for doing this.”
“Be proud of me after I’ve gone to the appointment.”
With a smile, she shakes her head. “I can be proud of you for both.”
“I’m proud of you, too,” Wilder says quietly. “And relieved, if I’m being honest.”
I think I might be, too.
Cora wraps her arms around me, and after a second Wilder does as well. Everything in me screams that I should be uncomfortable with this, that there’s no way they could be so accepting. But then Cora presses a soft kiss to my neck.
“One step at a time,” she whispers.
Wilder nods. “And we’ll be here with you the whole time.”
Finally, I relax. “Thanks, guys.”
“I’ll do anything I can to help,” Cora says. “Even if you need to call me and talk about things you’ve told me about a thousand times. I’ll listen again.”
“I know you would,” I murmur.
She smiles. “Good.”
After that, we all settle on the couch together, either working or getting school done. We have a lot to get done, especially since Wilder told me earlier that he has plans for tonight. I think Cora will love what he has in store.
For a second, I stare at both of them. Cora is writing while glancing between her textbook and notebook, and Wilder is typing away on his laptop. I could get used to afternoons like this.
“I love you. Both of you.”
They both look up from their work.
“Love you too, Ez,” Wilder says.
Cora grins. “A lot.”