Page 21 of Always Her Cowboy
“Why?”
“Because otherwise, the years we’ve wasted may eat me alive.”
“There was no waste. You went down separate paths, and now they’re joining back up. You don’t have to make any decisions right now. Just try to keep an open mind. Because the way your lives are aligning right now is too close to ignore.”
“Fey. I find it hard to believe the universe is plotting to bring us together.”
Fey smiles sadly. “That’s because you’ve been surrounded by darkness for too long. Now’s your time to heal.”
“No. I grew up and got my ass kicked by reality, Fey.” I quicken my steps, brushing past her to hide in the shadow the SUV provides.
“What’s going on?” Fey whispers, grabbing my arm gently.
“The worst part about the break-up wasn’t his business betrayal. He admitted that he didn’t want kids, and he’d known for years. He just thought he could change my mind or wait me out until it was too risky to pursue that dream.”
Fey growls. “Selfish asshole!”
“Now I’m startingfrom scratch with my biological clock ticking in my ear and my trust issues turning dating into something akin to entering a war zone. I’ve spent the past two years fighting not just for the company but some semblance of the soul he shattered. I’m here.” I place a hand over my racing heart.
“I’m not one-hundred percent. I don’t know I will ever be again, but I’m ready to move forward.”
“And I am here to help you any way I can.”
“I don’t want to make the same mistakes. When I say I do. I need it to be once. I’ve wasted enough time playing house with a stranger dressed in the costume of a man I once loved.”
I lower my head. “I don’t know when he changed so drastically.”
“Because he didn't want you to see it, babe. You guys were caught up in a whirlwind of deals, store openings, and house updates. A lot was going on. Don’t punish yourself because he was an accomplished liar. Charm can be a weapon.”
“You never liked him.”
“I didn’t think he was good enough for you. No. But when I saw how happy you were and your success together, I stopped prying and checking in. I’m so sorry I let you down—.”
“No.” I wrap my arms around her. “You didn’t. I never would’ve seen it. I was too caught up in planning our future. Something he regularly participated in, mind you.” Huffing, I step back.
“Why didn’t you tell me, Daph?” her voice wavers.
“I was ashamed. But the secrets kept me isolated, and I refuse to allow James to control any part of my life.” I lift my chin.
“Good. Because you deserve every happiness.” A car door slams in the distance, and I jump. Wiping my tears away on my buffalo checkered flannel, I fan my face. “Enough of that. We’ve got a booth to set up and stock.”
She nods. “If you ever need to talk about anything.”
“I know.” My words are for her benefit. To me, they’re lies I want to believe desperately. James’s action cut deep and destroyed my trust in men and my ability to pick them. I don’t know how to rebuild on the cracked, scorched surface my last relationship left behind. Better to be a Godmother with a thriving business. It’ll have to be enough to fill the empty spaces. Throwing myself into setup, I keep the conversation light until the other Stephens begin to arrive, and the pace picks up. I’d gone back and forth about making my fresh start here. After a few weeks, I can’t imagine going anywhere else.
“Daphne Blume, as I live and breathe, it is you.”
Closing the glass door on the case, I smile at my English teacher Senior Year. “Mrs. Caldwell. How are you?”
“I’m good. Are you visiting?”
“I’m here for a while.”
“Oh.” A look of sympathy passes over her round face. Her silver hair brushes her shoulders, highlighting her pale blue eyes. There are deeper crow’s feet around her eyes and mouth, but the lines tell a story of joy. “Well, we’re happy to have you for however long you decide to stay.”
“Thank you.” I smile at the woman who gave me different ways to express myself. “Are you still teaching at the high school? “
“Only now and then as a substitute when I’m needed. I’m enjoying my retirement. Vern and I are traveling, and I’m working on writing a book of my own.”