Page 51 of Winter Unleashed
“Oh, babe,” Ciara said. “Is that why you’ve been so weird? Are you worried you’ll lose your position as Alpha?
“Yes. They said they think Ember would make a better Alpha because of the strength of her power.” He sighed. “It’s just a matter of time before they request I step down.”
“Oh, Isaac,” I said. “I’m sorry. It was only two women. You don’t know how the rest of the pack feels.”
He shifted his gaze between Liam and me. “It’d help if you came out and told everyone who you are.”
Liam shook his head. “We will not reveal who we are to the Cullum County pack because you’re scared of losing your position. We can only make that announcement at the Annual Pack Summit, and I have no intention of doing that either.” He turned to glare at me when I kicked him in the shin. When he saw my expression, he shifted in his seat and cleared his throat. “Uh, listen, Stephens, I want to help you, but we cannot do what you’re asking.”
“Uh… Would it help if we held a pack meeting?” I asked. “I could tell everyone I don’t want the position. That I want you to be Alpha.”
He shrugged. “It’s worth a try. Besides, you’re bound to get pregnant at some point. You can’t be Alpha then. OW! Son of a bitch, woman,” he ground out from a clenched jaw as he rubbed his arm where Ciara had punched him.
“Did you just say a woman can’t be Alpha because they can get pregnant?” Her face was red, and she’d balled her hands into fists. “I cannot believe my mate is a caveman.”
“Listen, woman,” he said then hissed when she punched him again.
“Stop calling me woman.”
“Do not hit me again,” Isaac said with a slight growl in his tone. “I only meant that being Alpha is stressful. The pressure has forced me to shift more than I can count. I know it’s happened to Liam and the other Alphas too. If it happens while she’s pregnant, she’d lose the baby.”
Ciara glared at him, but I saw her jaw relax. “Uh-huh, good save.”
He leaned in and kissed her. “It wasn’t a save. I genuinely believe some things are the way they are for a reason and not because of misogyny. Women carry babies, men don’t. Alphas are under an immense amount of stress at any given time. Stress triggers the shift. If a pregnant woman shifts, they lose the baby. It’s biology, not patriarchy,woman.”
She smiled. “That does make sense, but it can take a while for us to get pregnant. And even then, it’s not like we’re pregnant all year round. If it is that risky, the Beta can take on more responsibility while we’re carrying.”
“That’s a good idea.” He beamed a smile at her. “I’m lucky to have such a smart mate.”
She stuck her tongue out at him. “Regardless of good theories, you’ll have to come up with something better when you talk to the others. At least one female will take issue with your reasoning.”
“She’s right,” I said. “But, more importantly, I don’twantto be Alpha, and I don’t want kids. At least not anytime soon.”
Stella scoffed. “Why do you always deny yourself?” She shook her head at my questioning look. “First with love, now with kids. You adore the children at the Academy. You’re fooling yourself when you say you don’t want your own.”
“Hmm… No, I’m not, Stella. I love those kids, but they don’t come home with me. At the end of the day, they’re someone else’s temper-tantrum-throwing, constantly-sticky-for-no-reason responsibility.”
She looked at me with narrowed eyes and pursed lips. “Sure, okay.”
I stared at her for a long time while I thought about it, but when I answered her my eyes were on Liam. “The truth is… a part of me is scared I’ll end up like our parents.”
Liam took my hands in his. The intensity in his eyes had me looking away. “No, Red, look at me.” He waited until I did. “You’re the kindest, most caring being I’ve ever met. In all the time I’ve walked this earth I’ve never known anyone as compassionate as you.”
I looked around the room. Out of the six of us there had been one good parent. I glanced at Isaac because unless he was hiding some horrible secret about his parents, like Stella had been, his mom was the best mom in the world.
Isaac’s dad wasn’t a nice man, but he never purposely hurt Isaac. And while he only showed his wife affection, he took great care of his son. After he’d died in the pack war, Isaac’s mom moved into the Seasons Lodge to get through the grief of losing a mate. To a lot of shifters, the death of a mate is worse than dying yourself. She eventually moved back to her own home but wasn’t fully herself until Isaac found Ciara. The prospect of grandkids had given her a renewed vigor for life.
I nibbled my lip while thinking about the odds of becoming a good parent. From the people in the room alone, there had been only one out of six. One in six seemed like shitty odds to me.
Liam lifted his hands to cup my face, rubbing his thumb along my abused lip. “If you don’t want children, that’s okay, but this can’t be your reason. Because you could never be like Brent. Never.” Tears burned my eyes as his lips touched mine.
I closed my eyes and let myself get lost in his kiss. I didn’t care that the others were there, that they might be watching. Talking about my feelings wasn’t something I normally did. Revealing my fear about parenthood had taken a lot, and it showed how safe I felt around the people in that room. Mostly, it was Liam. He’d shown me I could be vulnerable without fear of getting hurt.
On a sigh, I pulled out of the kiss but not away from him. “Thank you, Mr. Fraser.”
“Any time, Red.” He kissed the tip of my nose before settling back into his seat. “Back to business?” I nodded and motioned for him to continue. “Astrid thinks there’s a way to save you two,” he said with a nod toward Stella and Philip.
Philip stiffened but said nothing. Stella looked between Liam and me. She opened her mouth to speak but her phone rang. “It’s Bruno,” she said with a furrowed brow. “Excuse me.”