Page 24 of Beta Hybrid

Cai paws uncomfortably at the ground. I went after you. I mean, I started to.

‘What?’ I’m so startled I speak aloud.

My father convinced me to reject you. His voice is soft, but deep with regret. That doesn’t mean I wanted to. That night, I lied to them, my family, everyone, and said I wanted to go for a hunt, to get my mind off it all. I went after you. I only got so far. A friend of my father’s turned me around. Said I would shame the whole pack, my legacy, if I did. I just… I felt so awful. I messed up that hotel room. Then I went home. Alone. He lays down, face nearly in the dirt. I never wanted anyone but you.

I let his words wash over me. Crash over me. I blink stupidly into the gloom. A spear of hate and anger pierce me.

Cai flinches.

I exhale. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for—I reach out to gently stroke his fur. I didn’t mean for that to hit you. My fingers glide through his soft fur, and I hope it’s reassuring.

Cai nuzzles hesitantly into my touch. You have nothing to be sorry for. But no. I didn’t know if I’d ever see you again, but that didn’t matter.

I’m tempted to pull my hand back at my stir of guilt. I was with two other guys. Witches. I thought I’d never be with anyone. I don’t know how to explain that it helped fulfill a need, but it wasn’t even on the same scale of enjoyment and pleasure as it is when I’m with him. I don’t know how to voice asking if I should feel bad that I’ve been with two other guys. It’s not something I can change. I don’t know if I even regret it. For a little while, hell, if only for half an hour, they made me feel a little less alone.

Cai paws at the ground playfully. Nothing to feel bad for. He licks my hand gently, that rough tongue familiar.

It’s very hard to tell, looking at a wolf, but I swear he’s almost smiling. Whatever he feels, he seems to be okay with this. I push the past aside. Or, I do my best. What matters now is us.

Cai nods, still reading my thoughts. He jitters for a moment, sitting up, then laying down, again and again. I’ll be right back. I need to, uh, work off some energy.

I try not to smirk. I raise my hand, letting my ball of green light illuminate the gloom of the woods, sending shards of light scattering over the trunks of trees and over low-hanging leaves. A rabbit darts away.

Cai’s nose whips toward it, but he doesn’t want a snack. He nuzzles me once before darting off into the woods, a howl ripping from his throat.

Chapter Ten

Mordecai

My jaw clenched, I launch into the woods, away from my mate. She smells so fucking good. Every part of her glistens, pulling me toward her. For every moment I’ve been with her today, I’ve pictured taking her. Even against that tree she leaned against.

I shake my head as I run. This would be easier if she knew how I felt. I pushed it all down as hard as I could while she was connected to me, but I couldn’t hold it off anymore.

The burning in my legs as I run is a tiny, minor distraction from the need trying to tear me apart. It’s not just an aching, longing to get laid. This fucking Mating Ritual thing is serious shit. I probably should have told Zenna about it earlier, but how do you bring that up?

I push myself harder, needing more of a distraction. It’s been a long time since I’ve run this hard. The burning in my legs inflames, but it’s not enough. Not even close.

How do I casually bring up—to the woman I’ve been with for about a week—oh, hey, when the full moon rises, I’m going to want to fuck you incessantly and try to get you pregnant and have my wolf pups, and I hope they grow up big and strong and do me proud?

I shake my head again. Stupid Mating Ritual.

On my normal days, I’ve thought about mating with Zenna, the pups we’ll sire. My sane-self pictures a little girl with big, blue eyes like her mama, and flowing silver hair.

A flash of taking Zenna against another tree interrupts the calmer thought, sending me reeling. A whiff of something catches my nose, arresting me. I halt in the woods, eyes darting. What is that smell?

I pad quietly toward it. Every nerve ending in my body is on fire. I can’t concentrate enough on the smell to recognise it.

My wolf growls, low and deep enough to rattle my teeth.

The only thing better than fucking my mate right now would be killing something. I lick my chops hungrily. Yes, sinking my teeth into something. Ripping it apart. Bloodlust. Close enough.

I touch my nose to the ground, trying to pick up the scent. I paw angrily at the ground when I can’t find it. Claws extended, I start gouging a tree apart, feeling it tear easily under me. I don’t even register the satisfaction. I want to shred it apart.

A low howl turns my head.

Wolf.

A snarl rips through me. Hunt. I bound towards the sound, toward a foe to take down. Grass peels away under my claws. My whole body is burning. There’s a foe out here. Maybe they’re here for my mate. What if they want her, too? I’ll kill them. I’ll protect her.