Page 53 of Dare To Free Us
In a very short time I went from second rate to the top of the list with all eyes on me. I became the heir my father wanted and he shaped me how he saw fit. But the responsibility was never meant to be mine.
With Luca by my side I took on my role and became a leader I was proud of. But every time the world turned to total shit, I wished I was still that boy knowing the burden would never land on me.
“I’m going home for the evening.” It was all I said as I threw my jacket on and left.
On the way home I tried to prepare myself for the lack of peace I would get there. Arianna was still breaking apart in front of me and I had no idea how to help her.
My frustration morphed and changed until anger yanked a chain around my neck hard enough to choke me. I needed her to tell me what was wrong so I could help her. So I could fix at least one thing out of the million that were piling up.
Selfishly, I needed my wife back. I needed her calming spirt that leached the stress away when I’d see her smile. I needed the peace she brought when pressed against me with trust and love. Not to mention my blue balls were becoming a major problem. I craved her sexy body with aching loins every time I saw her.
She was going to tell me what was wrong if I had to demand it out of her. Keeping it bottled up was drowning her and killing me. Enough was enough.
I pulled into the driveway narrowly missing the duel gates as they opened. My mansion of grey stone that I always though of as my castle greeted me in the late evening light. Racing up to the driveway I skidded to a halt at the front, not bothering to go around to the garage. I flung the door open to the house and entered the foyer like I’d tear the walls down around me.
“Matteo!” My mothers voice caught me off guard. I tuned and noted the look in her eyes at my obvious frustration.
“What is it?” I snapped, and immediately regretted it. Softening I tried again. “What is it, mother?” She walked up to me looking unsure, but still perfect with her hair up in a pristine bun and a dress that screamed class.
“Matteo I need to speak to you about Arianna.”
I straightened, fearing the worst. “Is she ok?”
“Yes, in the sense that you are asking, but not entirely.” She rubbed her hands together as if feeling a bit uncomfortable.
“What do you mean?”
“Has Arianna told you what it wrong yet?”
“No. Did she tell you?” I ground out. She shook her head helplessly.
“Matteo.” She placed a soothing hand on my arm and got closer.
However close we’d become after my father’s death, my own mother was still unsure of how far her boundaries reached when it came to me. It would take time for her to feel completely comfortable to speak her mind, no matter how many times I encouraged it.
“Matteo, you need to try and understand something. Arianna is still the woman you fell in love with. The woman who still loves you with a fierceness that makes me envy you, but now that she is pregnant some things will change. The way she thinks about things and sees the world will change. For her it’s scary and unavoidable and she will need you to be understanding.”
“I don’t understand what you are talking about.” It was like she was speaking in riddles. Having a baby inside her makes her think differently, what the hell did that mean?
My mother smiled and she went from lovely to beautiful. My father was a fool for not having an ounce of love for her. Any man on the planet would have been lucky to be married to an Italian beauty like Maria. “I know you don’t son. Just remember to try andlistento what she is telling you.”
I sighed. “Ok, I will.” Leaning down I pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Where is she?”
“In her studio,” she replied with a sad smile.
I turned and headed to the back of the house. My mind was craving a soothing word from my wife and my body craved sex from my lover. Arianna was indeed both but knew I probably wouldn’t be getting either tonight.
12
ARIANNA
Isat staring at the first painting I’d completed in a long time thinking I didn’t know my own hands anymore, or mind for that matter.
All around me my art hung on the walls and laid on tables. Beautiful painting of pleasure, joy and serenity. I painted scenery that calmed the soul and made you want to escape into a world that conveyed peace, but what I loved painting most were bodies in black and white or grayscale.
My focus centered on skin and the beauty of showing a lot of it while remaining tasteful. But no matter what I painted: a woman spread out in tangled sheets, or a profile of her head tipped back in ecstasy, it felt inviting. Even the men I painted— Matteo was usually my inspiration— they made you want lean closer and feel the heat.
The painting looking back at me was anything but calming. The woman’s dark hair hung wet and matted around her face. Lost, sad eyes stared back at me as if the world she existed in had destroyed all the joy in her heart. Her lips were slightly parted as if she couldn’t quite catch her breath.