Page 76 of Charmed
He jerked his gaze around the room, searching, and immediately found her sitting at the edge of the mattress, her back to him. He blew out a careful breath, relief washing over the panic. Until he realized she was dressed, head bowed, and her posture wailing red alert warning signs.
Concern and unease tore at his stomach while he slowly sat up. “Fi? What’s wrong?” His tattoo pulsed harder.
“It’s time.”
Time. How he hated the concept. There was never enough when he needed or wanted it, and yet it dragged an eternity when he’d wished for it to breeze past. Take this very second for example. It was time to enact their plan to meet his uncle and glean insight to his motives. But she clearly meant it was time to ignore everything they’d become together for the sake of destiny.
Always, always the blasted tasks came first. They were crucial. He got that. He really did. But when, exactly, or would there ever come a time he registered as something of importance to her? That she wanted him around? That she cared a smidgen of how much he did? Because there she sat, mere hours since he’d spilled his guts and bared his soul by telling her he loved her…and she was in her clothes, armor in place, obviously intent on sneaking out under the cover of darkness.
Alone. Forever alone.
He ground his jaw. “Were you planning on saying goodbye?”
Crickets.
Her lack of response was deafening. And it cut deep.
She might not survive the night. Hell, he might not, either. The fate of two families rested on their shoulders. They were up against who knew what with however many foes determined to triumph, no matter the cost. He’d sliced open an artery for the sake of honesty so she would know she was his everything, in case his worst fears came to pass.
Where was she? Halfway out the door, not even checking to see if he was in her cloud of dust.
“Wow, Fi.” Nodding, he climbed from bed and yanked open a dresser drawer. “I’m speechless. At least you finally got the annoying pest to quit buzzing. I’m fresh out of witty comebacks.”
“I refuse to say goodbye. This isn’t the end.”
Oh, he sorely disagreed. They were over before they’d begun. He never stood a chance.
Stepping into a pair of sweats, he dropped his hands on his hips and attempted to figure out if yelling at the top of his lungs or shaking the shit out of her would be more productive.
“We’re going to come out the other side, Riley.”
“You don’t know that.” And, man. She still didn’t get it. “Dying doesn’t frighten me. Not a fraction of how much you dying does, babe. Know why? Because I love you. I’ve said it, but you have yet to listen. Your real superpower is selective hearing.”
Her confused, irritated gaze jerked from her inner wrist to him. Her mark was red and inflamed due to him being in emotional distress. Strangely, his was also, meaning she was upset. Apparently not for the same reasons, though, or else she’d buy a clue.
“I heard you just fine.” She flipped her long strands over her shoulder. “Don’t be so dramatic.”
“Said the woman who breeds drama by the litter.”
She rolled her gorgeous eyes and glared at the ceiling. “There’s a plan. I need to implement it or we’ll be spinning our wheels forever. I thought you understood that. There’s no time for arguing. I have to get home to grab a few potions just in case they’re needed. I’m supposed to be at the cove in—”
“I, I, I. Do you hear yourself?” He dug his thumb and forefinger into his eye sockets. “We’re a team, the six of us.” Or they were supposed to be. Sadly, Kaida might’ve been correct all along that Fiona was incapable of letting anyone in or accepting help. Independent to the core. “I guess that was my mistake, thinking we mattered. I mattered.”
“Of course, you matter. All of you. I love my sisters. I’ve stood next to your brothers and fought. I’m here with you right this second.”
“No, you’re not.” She loved her sisters, yes. She had backed up his brothers and had, perhaps, given him more of herself than she’d allowed any other man. Yet it wasn’t enough. Six months ago, he might’ve thought differently. But that was then. He was a different person now because of her. “You’re not here. You’re already at the cove, preparing for battle. Magick and fate aren’t the only wars we’re up against.”
“If I’m not focused, things will go sideways fast, and you guys could get hurt.”
“What if you’re right? What if we win tonight? What then?” Chances were, they’d be back here at the same stalemate—her keeping him outside her magical circle, and him begging her to drop the ward. “There will always be another thing for you to fight. I’m sick of being one of them.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about us, babe. You know how I feel. Not once have you granted me the same respect.” He looked at his feet, gearing himself to do the necessary.
All his life, he’d never heard those three little words. The exception being Tristan and Brady since they were the only people who actually loved him. He’d avoided this very scenario in all relationships because he’d never been the kind of man who could handle pain in any form. Fact was, he’d settled for less than he deserved as a result. Ironic how the one person who had broken through years of protective coating was the very woman who’d inflicted the most damage.
“I’m done.” He looked at her, really looked, and struggled to make her understand. “You’re all I breathe, sleep, and drink. I would lay down and die for you. But, this?” He gestured between them. “I’m done. You need to decide what it is you want when destiny calls Checkmate.”