Page 8 of Help Me Remember
“Do they know how to treat amnesia?” I asked, returning her tone. “Do they have pills and injections for that?”
She frowned. “No, but they can see how bad the swelling in your brain is, which you most assuredly have. You’re not threatening to pass out and not severely confused or throwing your guts up constantly, so I suspect your concussion isn’t bad. Still, they have far better equipment and staff to help you.”
Glancing between them, I could see that both she and Eric agreed. I couldn’t very well tell them the idea of going to a hospital filled me with a dread that was impossible to explain. It was no different than all the other times that quiet but firm instinct had struck me. Maybe it was because it was the only part of me that felt like it could be a remnant of my former self, or perhaps it was just sheer stubbornness but I had to cling to that little voice desperately.
“Is this your way of telling me you’re going to make me go?” I asked, trying to keep any trace of sullenness out of my voice.
The doctor scoffed, removing her latest pair of gloves and throwing them away. “Technically, I can’t make you do anything you don’t want to do. So long as you aren’t a danger to yourself or others, there isn’t much I can do. You don’t, by chance, suddenly feel motivated to take a swing at one of us, do you?”
“No,” I told her with a frown, “I don’t.”
“Ah well, that’s a shame. It would certainly make things a lot easier.”
“Getting punched would make things easier for you?”
“It’s not the first time someone’s hit me in this clinic, and I’m sure it wouldn’t be the last either. But, if you did do something like that, I would be well within my power to have you sent to the hospital.”
“Well, even if that wasn’t the case, I really don’t feel like punching anyone at the moment,” I said, glancing down at my clothes. “Can I get dressed now?”
I watched as she glanced at Eric, who was watching me intently, his lips a thin line. “Sure. I can get you a couple of things that should be safe for you to take but there’s not a lot I can give you otherwise. Anything too strong might make whatever’s going on in your head worse.”
“Am I allowed to sleep?” I asked as I slid off the chair and bent over to grab my clothes. That alone was enough to show I was in no state to swing at anyone. As skinny and frail as she looked, I was pretty sure the doctor could overpower me if she wanted.
“You’re allowed to sleep, but do you even know where you’re going to do that?” she asked, leaning against the cabinet and watching my slow movements.
Aware of both sets of eyes on me, I made sure to cover up any signs of my frailty as I pulled on my pants. “Why do you care?”
She sighed, glancing toward Eric. “Was he this difficult when he was…himself?”
Eric continued to frown in my direction, and I was half tempted to tell him his face would stick if he kept it up. “A pain in the ass doesn’t even begin to cover it. I always joked that he came into the world that way, but I wasn’t expecting proof it was true.”
“It’s certainly a fascinating insight into the argument of nature versus nurture,” she mused, crossing her arms over her chest. “Is it all there? Who he was?”
Eric shrugged. “It’s hard to tell. Like I said, we drifted apart after he left, and then he pretty much went radio silent and just…disappeared. I didn’t know what he was doing half the time, even before that.”
He drifted off, leaving the doctor and me to stare at him curiously. The more I saw of this man, the more I began to wonder just what was going on in his head. All the energy and vigor he’d shown upon entering the room and trying to talk to me had completely disappeared, at least outwardly. I suspected all that energy had turned inward, and I was struck by the image of what the inside of a tornado looked like for someone stuck in the middle.
“Good Lord, he’s thinking.” The doctor sighed, shaking her head, then turned her attention back to me. “And for the record, I care in general. It comes with the territory.”
I said nothing as I finished tugging on my shirt and moved to pull on my boots. I supposed that people didn’t work in a run-down free clinic unless they gave a shit about what they did. Then again, the other people here appeared to be so disconnected from their surroundings that it was amazing they even bothered in the first place. Perhaps this was where people worked because they cared, and maybe it was also where they found themselves trapped.
“And I would feel much better if I knew you weren’t just wandering out of here with no clue of who you are, where you’re going, or what you’re going to do,” she told me with a frown. “I understand that for whatever reason, you don’t want to bother anyone else or go to the hospital, but you’re more than aware enough to know you’re not exactly in the best of health.”
I bent over, carefully trying to tie the laces of my boots with great difficulty. I knew better than she did that I wasn’t in any real shape to take care of myself, but I was antsy to get out of the clinic. Despite what she’d said earlier, I didn’t put it past her to try to interfere in some way that could cause me more trouble. Especially if she was the type to worry about others, her good conscience might make her want to take action.
“Even if I don’t remember who I am, I was still capable of getting myself here without incident,” I said, finishing the final knot. “So I guess I’m pretty good at taking care of myself. You should worry about the people out there who might not be so lucky.”
“Is this where you try to appeal to my sense of compassion for others instead of you?”
“This is where I point out there are people out there who deserve attention and care more than I do.”
“You are so fucking stupid. Jesus!” Eric barked, causing both the doctor and me to turn toward him. The man glared at me, his arms crossed over his chest as he practically radiated annoyance. “Like, seriously, do you have any idea how badly injured you are? I don’t even know the full story, and I can see you’re beat to shit, and you’re just going to go walking out of here when you were just told your brain is probably swelling?”
“That would explain the headache,” I said dryly, even though said headache felt like Thor himself was pounding around inside my skull with his hammer.
Eric threw up his hands and turned toward the doctor. “Look, my shift ends in an hour. I’ll take him back to my place.”
“What?” I asked, staring at him in shock.