Page 57 of The Wrong Track
“Good job! We’re proud.”
Well, I kind of was also. I was a little proud of myself.
“I have her in the pack so we can walk together for your cooldown,” he told me and the two of them came down the steps to where I stood, almost collapsing. It had felt like the longest two miles of my life. “Come on, champ. Take your victory lap.”
It was more like a victory stumble as we went along the sidewalk. Various neighbors who’d been mostly closed in for the winter were out and enjoying the spring sunshine and of course, Tobin knew them all. They wanted to stop and talk, to meet me if they hadn’t yet and especially the baby.
“Oh, she’s precious,” a woman named Mrs. Schumer sighed happily. “It’s been too long since we had a little one on this block!”
“How are your grandkids?” Tobin asked her and they chatted, giving me more time to rest. But my ears perked back up when I heard him ask, “Are you still doing babysitting?” and she said not so much anymore, but she’d be thrilled to watch Tobin’s daughter.
“She’s not—she’s my daughter,” I interrupted. “She’s not—we’re all roommates. Tobin isn’t her father.”
“Oh,” Mrs. Schumer said. She blinked. “Well, I would be happy to keep an eye on Tobin’s roommate, too. You let me know if you need some help.”
I did, actually, so I asked her about when she was available and how much she charged. Now that Ella’s naps were more set and regular, I’d been able to get more work done for Annie but it still wasn’t enough. Plus, Annie had been asking me to do some other things—like she wanted me to come into the office to help organize, she asked for my opinions about existing projects, she thought I should come to some of her reno sites and look around and learn. I could do some of those activities with the baby in her carrier, but it didn’t work great. I knew there was the opportunity to make more money if I had more time, but, of course, I’d also be paying for a sitter. I’d been saving for a car, putting money toward groceries, and sending as much as I could for my sister. It never stretched as far as I wanted.
“She’s been watching kids in this neighborhood for as long as I can remember,” Tobin told me as we walked away. “She babysat me, for example, and I’m great.”
“So you say.” I turned and looked back toward her house. “That would be good for me. It’s not like I want to be away from Ella, but I need the work.”
“You’re doing ok.”
“I need that new car,” I reminded him, because I knew that he didn’t enjoy that I was still driving Hatch’s loaner around. Driving it legally, now, since I had a real Michigan license. I’d filled out some more of my life plan, too, and that definitely included having my own transportation. I had my eye on a used car that was for sale at Tobin’s cousin’s dealership, and since they were family, it was on hold for me as I made trifling payments toward ownership. “It’s going to take me forever to buy it.”
“I made a payment,” he said briefly, and I stopped and grabbed his arm.
“You did what?”
“I made a payment. Kind of a big one. You’re almost there now.”
“No, you can’t do that. No! We’ll go and ask for your money back.”
Tobin laughed. “You think that’s how it works? No, we won’t go begging my cousin for a refund. I don’t want the money back.”
But I knew that he didn’t have a ton to spare. He was at the bottom of the salary ladder and he also had loans from college that he was paying off. “Tobin, why did you do that?”
“You need your own car. That’s a good one, safe and clean for you and the baby. Come on, keep up the cooldown.” He took my hand, like we did at night.
“Thank you,” I told him. “Thank you.” It got me closer to my goal of vehicle ownership, which brought me closer to my goal of driving it out of this state. To New Mexico, I’d decided, and I’d picked the town, too, definitely and not just in the weird, vague way I’d been acting before. I had an idea of an apartment that we could rent based on the calculation sheet that Monica had given me and I also knew how much money I’d have to make to pay for it and for daycare for Ella. I looked over at her, happily pressed against Tobin’s chest, her dark eyes alert and interested, and then I looked up at him.
“What? You look like you’re going to cry. Are you in that much pain? Am I going to have to carry you home?” he asked me.
I swallowed and shook it off. “I’d like to see you try. You’re the one in the boot,” I reminded him.
“Not for much longer,” he reminded me back. “I’ll be outrunning you soon enough.”
“A sloth could outrun me.”
“Then I’m all set for the win,” he said. “Hell, that’s nice to see.”
“Spring?” I asked, glancing around us. I also liked to see the mist of light emerald on some branches, the dark mud turning green from the spouts coming from the earth.
“I mean how you’re smiling so much more now. You never used to,” Tobin said, “even though I’m so charming and funny.” He squeezed my hand. “I think you’re happier.”
Was I? I thought about that. I knew that I wasn’t afraid like I had been before. I didn’t have the feeling that something was coming, watching, close. At least, I didn’t have that as much, and if I had dreams, I woke up and Tobin was there. Every night, he was there.
Well, most of them. He had to work, of course, and those nights were harder. And sometimes he’d been going out, too. With friends, that was what I meant, with his guy friends or his cousins. He hadn’t seen Lulu as far as I knew, and he’d fended off that Devon, the woman whom we’d seen in the restaurant. She’d been persistent but Tobin had told her (nicely) that he wasn’t interested. She’d still been persistent but seemed to have gotten the message after he told her “no” again, still nicely but a lot more firmly.