Page 63 of The Puck Charmer
She turns her head, takes one look at my sorry ass, and flicks off the television.
“Oh, no,” she says and climbs to her feet. “Alek…what happened?”
“It didn’t go so well.”
I plunk down onto the sofa and bury my face in my hands. “I totally fucked it up, Quinn. I love her and now I’ve lost her. I should have just told her right from the start.”
She sits on the coffee table facing me, her blue eyes big and worried. “There has to be a way to fix this. Alyssa is a smart girl. She’ll understand why you did what you did. I’m sure she’s going to give you a second chance.”
I shake my head, doubting that. My God, the hurt in her eyes, hurt I put there, feels like a fist to the gut. “I lied to her. She hates liars.”
“But she loves you, Alek, and while you hurt her, deep inside she knows your heart is in the right place.”
“Do you think so?”
“I know so. She might just need a little time.”
“I love her, Quinn,” I say, as tears pound behind my eyes. “I fucking love her and I’ve never loved any woman before.”
“I saw you two together. I could see the love on her face, and on yours. You two belong together. Of that I have no doubt. You can’t leave here, Alek, not without making this right between you two.”
“Her whole life, people have walked out on her, left her behind, and let her down. I never wanted to be one of those people. I want to be the guy she can count on, the one that’s going to stick around for the long haul.” I grab a fistful of my hair. “But now…”
“Now you have to figure out how to make this right?”
“As much as she hates people leaving, she told me to leave and never come back.”
She puts one hand on my knee and gives it a squeeze. “So what are you going to do about that?”
“I don’t know. She won’t even listen to me.”
“Then you need to do something, something big that will give her no choice but to listen.”
“How…what?”
“Maybe you need to show her you’re not like those other people. Maybe you need to show her you’re sorry, and no matter what, you’re not going to leave, even if she’s pushing you away.”
My throat is so tight, it hurts, making it hard to talk. “How am I supposed to do that?”
“You’re a smart guy, Alek,” she says softly. “I bet you can figure it out.”
18
Alyssa
It’s been two long days since I’ve set eyes on Alek, and even though I’m hurt and angry, I’m still mourning his absence. After I kicked him out of the nursing home, I went home and ate a tub of ice cream and wallowed in self-pity until I fell asleep crying. Ridiculous, I know, but I thought we had more, thought we had a closeness, an intimacy that went beyond a summer fling. Thought there was something blossoming between us, but the only thing blossoming were the flowers I planted in Mrs. Henderson’s yard.
I should have known better. I let down my guard and let him in, and I want to say he’s no better than anyone else in my life, but I can’t say that. He never once led me to believe we were going to have more, or that he might want to stay. No, I made that all up in my head. But I still don’t get why he kept his identity a secret. What was the point in that?
I walk through the nursing home and sign in. I lift my head, catching movement in the corner of my eye. My heart lurches when I glance at the exit door banging shut. Alek? I blink, sure I’m seeing things, and when I walk to the door to look out, he’s not there. Damn, I must be hallucinating. Flowers in hand, I head to Grandma’s room and she’s sitting up, a smile on her face as she talks to Vivian.
“Darling, how are you?” Vivian asks. Grandma holds her hand out to me.
I close the gap between us, take her frail hand in mine, and my heart pinches tight as I give her a comforting squeeze.
“I’m great,” I lie, but I fear they can easily see through it. Heck, my eyes are still puffy and red from all the tears, and I look like I haven’t combed my hair in days. “How are you both doing?”
“Oh, we’re just fine,” Vivian says.